Human nature and the social orderCooley, Charles Horton
Science
Human nature and the social order
Cooley, Charles Horton
Individualism; Social psychology; Sociology
The young performer soon learns to be different things to different
people, showing that he begins to apprehend personality and to foresee
its operation. If the mother or nurse is more tender than just she will
almost certainly be “worked” by systematic weeping. It is a matter of
common observation that children often behave worse with their mother
than with other and less sympathetic people. Of the new persons that a
child sees it is evident that some make a strong impression and awaken a
desire to interest and please them, while others are indifferent or
repugnant. Sometimes the reason can be perceived or guessed, sometimes
not; but the fact of selective interest, admiration, prestige, is
obvious before the end of the second year. By that time a child already
cares much for the reflection of himself upon one personality and little
for that upon another. Moreover, he soon claims intimate and tractable
persons as _mine_, classes them among his other possessions, and
maintains his ownership against all comers. M., at three years of age,
vigorously resented R.’s claim upon their mother. The latter was “_my_
mamma,” whenever the point was raised.
Strong joy and grief depend upon the treatment this rudimentary social
self receives. In the case of M. I noticed as early as the fourth month
a “hurt” way of crying which seemed to indicate a sense of personal
slight. It was quite different from the cry of pain or that of anger,
but seemed about the same as the cry of fright. The slightest tone of
reproof would produce it. On the other hand, if people took notice and
laughed and encouraged, she was hilarious. At about fifteen months old
she had become “a perfect little actress,” seeming to live largely in
imaginations of her effect upon other people. She constantly and
obviously laid traps for attention, and looked abashed or wept at any
signs of disapproval or indifference. At times it would seem as if she
could not get over these repulses, but would cry long in a grieved way,
refusing to be comforted. If she hit upon any little trick that made
people laugh she would be sure to repeat it, laughing loudly and
affectedly in imitation. She had quite a repertory of these small
performances, which she would display to a sympathetic audience, or even
try upon strangers. I have seen her at sixteen months, when R. refused
to give her the scissors, sit down and make believe cry, putting up her
under lip and snuffling, meanwhile looking up now and then to see what
effect she was producing.[45]
In such phenomena we have plainly enough, it seems to me, the germ of
personal ambition of every sort. Imagination co-operating with
instinctive self-feeling has already created a social “I,” and this has
become a principal object of interest and endeavor.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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