"I'll Leave It To You": A Light Comedy In Three ActsCoward, Noël
General
"I'll Leave It To You": A Light Comedy In Three Acts
Coward, Noël
Comedy plays; Inheritance and succession -- Drama
MRS. DERMOTT. We're saved--oh, my darlings! (_She breaks down again._)
JOYCE. He may not have any money after all.
MRS. DERMOTT. He'd never have got across so quickly if he hadn't. (_She
sniffs._) Oh, it's too, too wonderful--I have not seen him for six
years.
BOBBIE. As a matter of fact it is jolly decent of him to be so prompt.
MRS. DERMOTT. Where's Oliver? He ought to be here to welcome him too.
BOBBIE (C.). Oliver has gone for a brisk walk, to keep fit he said, as
if it made any difference whether he kept fit or not.
MRS. DERMOTT. It makes a lot of difference, dear. He is the athletic one
of the family. (BOBBIE _is annoyed_.) I don't like the way you speak of
him, Bobbie. We can't all compose songs and be brilliant. You must try
and cultivate a little toleration for others, darling. (OLIVER _passes
window from_ L.) Oliver is a great comfort to me. Tibbets only said----
EVANGELINE (_glancing out of the window_). Here he is, anyhow. Who's
going to tell him the news?
MRS. DERMOTT (_rising, goes to stairs_). Well, I've no time now, I must
change my dress for Daniel. Turn on the lights, Bobbie; make everything
look as cosy and festive as you can. (_On stairs._) Run into the
kitchen, Joyce dear, and tell cook to make an extra supply of hot cakes
for tea. I'm sure Daniel will love them after being so long abroad and
living on venison and bully beef and things. (_Ascending, then turns._)
You will all wash before tea, won't you, darlings? It's always so
important to make a good first impression, and he hasn't seen any of you
since you've been grown up. (_Glances in mirror._) Oh! look at my face,
I look quite happy now.
(_Exit_ MRS. DERMOTT _upstairs._)
SYLVIA. I think mother is rather mixing up North and South America; they
don't have such awful hardships where Uncle Daniel comes from.
(_Enter_ OLIVER _from hall; he is a thick-set, determined-looking man
of twenty-five._)
OLIVER. Hallo! (_Crossing to table_, L.C.)
JOYCE (_going to him, excitedly_). Something wonderful has happened,
Oliver.
OLIVER. What is it?
JOYCE. We're ruined. I've just got to go and order extra teacakes. Isn't
it all thrilling?
(_Exit_ JOYCE _into hall._)
OLIVER. What on earth's she talking about?
SYLVIA. It's perfectly true. We haven't any money, but Uncle Daniel's
coming to-day, and we're sure he'll help us.
OLIVER (_dazed_). Haven't any money, but----
EVANGELINE (_at fire_). Mother's been rather vague as usual, but we
gather that we're practically penniless, and that we shall have to give
up the house after two years unless something happens.
SYLVIA. Luckily Uncle Daniel is happening--this afternoon. Mother's just
had a wire from him--he's certain to be rich, mother says.
(BOBBIE _leaning against stairs._)
OLIVER. Why?
SYLVIA. Because he's a bachelor, and has been living in South America
for five years.
BOBBIE. Six years.
SYLVIA. Five years.
BOBBIE. Six years--mother said so.
SYLVIA. No, she didn't----
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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