London (England) -- Fiction; Satire; Suffragists -- Fiction
The town, like a brazen beauty feigning modesty, was withdrawn a little
from the wharves. There was a dry-looking grass space with goats as its
only gardeners. This the party crossed, and the sensitive plant ducked
and dived into its inner remoteness as they passed. The streets in front
of them, hot and glaring, pointed to the hills, like fevered fingers
pointing to peace which is unattainable.
The main street received them fiercely. The heat was like the blaring of
trumpets. The trams were intolerably noisy, clanking, and rattling like
a devil’s cavalry charge. Black, shining women, with the faces of
bull-dogs—only not so sincere—swung in a slow whirlwind of many
petticoats up and down the street, with vivid burdens of fruit piled in
ochre-coloured baskets on their heads. Little boys and girls, with their
clothes precariously slung on thin brown shoulders, and well aired by an
impromptu system of ventilation, ran by the gardener’s side, and
reminded him of the necessity of quatties and half-pinnies, even in this
paradise of the poor, where sustenance literally falls on your head from
every tree in the forest.
“This is exhausting,” said Mrs. Paul Rust, forced by extreme heat into a
confession of the obvious. “Policeman, where can we get a cab?”
“Yes, please, missis,” replied the policeman, who was tastefully dressed
in white, by way of a contrast to his complexion.
“Nonsense, man,” said Mrs. Rust. “I repeat, where can a cab be found?”
“No, please, missis,” replied the policeman, acutely divining that his
first answer had been found wanting.
“You fool,” said Mrs. Rust, another unoriginal comment wrung from her by
the heat.
The policeman understood this, and giggled bashfully in a high falsetto.
“Missis wanta buggy?” asked a tobacconist, with a slightly less dense
complexion, from his shop door. “Policeman nevah understand missis, he
only a niggah.”
The gardener, as ever prone to paint the lily, hurried into the breach.
“Ah yes, of course, we white men, we always hang together, eh?”
It was The Moment of that tobacconist’s life. The gardener all unawares
had crossed in one lucky stride those bitter channels that divide the
brown man from the black, the yellow man from the brown, the white man
from the yellow, and the buckra, the man from England, from all the
world.
Three buggies suddenly materialised noisily out of Mrs. Rust’s desire.
They were all first upon the scene, as far as one could judge from the
turmoil of conversation that immediately arose on the subject. The
gardener tried to look firm but unbiassed. The three women stood and
waited in a state of trance.
The sun was working so hard at his daily task in the sky, that one could
almost have pitied him for being called to such a flaming vocation in
this flaming weather.
Finally, Mrs. Rust awoke and, entering the nearest buggy, shook it to
its very core as she seated herself and said, “King’s Garden Hotel.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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