For some reasons, known but to himself, he took no step whatsoever to
bring the attempt upon his life, which he had so narrowly escaped, under
the notice of the authorities; on the contrary, he kept it jealously to
himself; and it was not for many weeks after the occurrence that he
mentioned it, and then in strict confidence, to a gentleman, whom the
torments of his mind at last compelled him to consult.
Spite of his blue devils, however, poor Barton, having no satisfactory
reason to render to the public for any undue remissness in the
attentions exacted by the relation subsisting between him and Miss
Montague was obliged to exert himself, and present to the world a
confident and cheerful bearing.
The true source of his sufferings, and every circumstance connected with
them, he guarded with a reserve so jealous, that it seemed dictated by
at least a suspicion that the origin of his strange persecution was
known to himself, and that it was of a nature which, upon his own
account, he could not or dared not disclose.
The mind thus turned in upon itself, and constantly occupied with a
haunting anxiety which it dared not reveal or confide to any human
breast, became daily more excited, and, of course, more vividly
impressible, by a system of attack which operated through the nervous
system; and in this state he was destined to sustain, with increasing
frequency, the stealthy visitations of that apparition which from the
first had seemed to possess so terrible a hold upon his imagination.
* * * * *
It was about this time that Captain Barton called upon the then
celebrated preacher, Dr. ——, with whom he had a slight acquaintance,
and an extraordinary conversation ensued.
The divine was seated in his chambers in college, surrounded with works
upon his favourite pursuit, and deep in theology, when Barton was
announced.
There was something at once embarrassed and excited in his manner,
which, along with his wan and haggard countenance, impressed the student
with the unpleasant consciousness that his visitor must have recently
suffered terribly indeed, to account for an alteration so
striking—almost shocking.
After the usual interchange of polite greeting, and a few common-place
remarks, Captain Barton, who obviously perceived the surprise which his
visit had excited, and which Doctor —— was unable wholly to conceal,
interrupted a brief pause by remarking—
“This is a strange call, Doctor ——, perhaps scarcely warranted by an
acquaintance so slight as mine with you. I should not under ordinary
circumstances have ventured to disturb you; but my visit is neither an
idle nor impertinent intrusion. I am sure you will not so account it,
when I tell you how afflicted I am.”
Doctor —— interrupted him with assurances such as good breeding
suggested, and Barton resumed—
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