The crisis had been reached: the tide of frenzy was turning, had
turned, was already ebbing. She felt it, was conscious that he also
had become aware of it. Then his grasp slackened, grew lax,
loosened, and almost spent. She ventured to unwind her limbs from
his, to relax her stiffened fingers, unclasp her arms.
It was over. She could scarcely stand, felt blindly for support,
rested so, and slowly unclosed her eyes.
"I've had to fight very hard for you," she whispered. "But I think
I've won."
He answered with difficulty.
"Yes--if you want the dog you fought for."
"It isn't what _I_ want, Kay."
"All right, I guess I can face it through--after this.... But I
don't know why you did it."
"I do."
"Do you? Don't you know I'm not a man, but a beast? And there are
half a hundred million real men to replace me--to do what you and
the country expect of real men."
"What may be expected of them I expect of you. Kay, I've made a good
fight for you, haven't I?"
He turned his quenched eyes on her. "From gutter to hospital, from
hospital to sanitarium, from sanitarium to ship," he said in a
colourless voice. "Yes, it was--a--good--fight."
"What a Calvary!" she murmured, looking at him out of clear,
sorrowful eyes. "And on your knees, poor boy!"
"You ought to know. You have made every station with me--on your
tender bleeding knees of a girl!" He choked, turned his head
swiftly; and she caught his hand. The break had come.
"Oh, Kay! Kay!" she said, quivering all over, "I have done my bit
and you are cured! You know it, don't you? Look at me, turn your
head." She laid her slim hand flat against his tense cheek but could
not turn his face. But she did not care; the palm of her hand was
wet. The break had come. She drew a deep, uneven breath, let go his
hand.
"Now," she said, "we can understand each other at last--our minds
are rational; and whether in accord or conflict they are at least in
contact; and mine isn't clashing with something disordered and
foreign which it can't interpret, can't approach."
He said, not turning toward her: "You are kind to put it that
way.... I think self-control has returned--will-power--all that....
I won't-betray you--Miss Erith."
"YOU never would, Mr. McKay. But I--I've been in terror of what has
been masquerading as you."
"I know.... But whatever you think of such a--a man--I'll do my
bit, now. I'll carry on--until the end."
"I will too! I promise you."
He turned his head at that and a mirthless laugh touched his wet
eyes and drawn visage:
"As though you had to promise anybody that you'd stick! You! You
beautiful, magnificent young thing--you superb kid--"
Her surprise and the swift blaze of colour in her face silenced him.
After a moment, the painful red still staining his face, he muttered
something about dressing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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