Introductory lectures on psycho-analysis : $b a course of twenty-eight lectures delivered at the University of ViennaFreud, Sigmund
Science
Introductory lectures on psycho-analysis : $b a course of twenty-eight lectures delivered at the University of Vienna
Freud, Sigmund
Psychoanalysis
In this connection it will be instructive to compare a child’s attitude
towards his brothers and sisters with his attitude towards his parents.
The little child does not necessarily love his brothers and sisters, and
often he is quite frank about it. It is unquestionable that in them he
sees and hates his rivals, and it is well known how commonly this
attitude persists without interruption for many years, till the child
reaches maturity and even later. Of course it often gives place to a
more tender feeling, or perhaps we should say it is overlaid by this,
but the hostile attitude seems very generally to be the earlier. We can
most easily observe it in children of two and a half to four years old
when a new baby arrives, which generally meets with a very unfriendly
reception; remarks such as “I don’t like it. The stork is to take it
away again” are very common. Subsequently every opportunity is seized to
disparage the new-comer; attempts are even made to injure it and actual
attacks upon it are by no means unheard-of. If the difference in age is
less, by the time the child’s mental activity is more fully developed
the rival is already in existence and he adapts himself to the
situation; if on the other hand there is a greater difference between
their ages, the new baby may rouse certain kindly feelings from the
first, as an object of interest, a sort of living doll; and when there
is as much as eight years or more between them, especially if the elder
child is a girl, protective, motherly impulses may at once come into
play. But, speaking honestly, when we find a wish for the death of a
brother or a sister latent in a dream we need seldom be puzzled, for we
find its origin in early childhood without much trouble, or indeed,
quite often in the later years when they still lived together.
There is probably no nursery without violent conflicts between the
inhabitants, actuated by rivalry for the love of the parents,
competition for possessions shared by them all, even for the actual
space in the room they occupy. Such hostility is directed against older
as well as younger brothers and sisters. I think it was Bernard Shaw who
said: “If there is anyone whom a young English lady hates more than her
mother it is her elder sister.” Now there is something in this dictum
which jars upon us; it is hard enough to bring ourselves to understand
hatred and rivalry between brothers and sisters, but how can feelings of
hate force themselves into the relation between mother and daughter,
parents and children?
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