Is it I? A book for every man.Storer, Horatio Robinson
Science
Is it I? A book for every man.
Storer, Horatio Robinson
Sexual ethics
But I have not time to pursue these collateral lines of thought,
manifold as they are, and as important as they are interesting. One
of the great rules of life being to try to have and to preserve a
sound mind in a sound body, and it being essential for this that the
conscience should be sound also, we are forced to admit that, all
things being equal, a comparatively early marriage is better for the
man than a late one; this on its medical grounds, and uninfluenced by
business, or other considerations. Were I to discuss these and push
them to their legitimate conclusions, I am afraid I might bring grief
to some of my readers—if, for instance, I should assert that it were
better for the wives of many seafaring men, especially those going
very long voyages, if their husbands had never married them at all,
or at least had waited till their days of absence, and peril, and
exposure, in foreign ports, to worse dangers than those of the sea,
were permanently over. By this remark I am reminded of the question
of long engagements—a very pertinent one to our present inquiry.
In presenting Mr. Acton’s opinion as to the advisability of early
marriage. I might have said that this very writer contradicts
himself, as must every one who undertakes to ignore the great
underlying and controlling passions of men. I have quoted some of
his remarks concerning continence. In another connection, however,
he says, “If an adult is in a position to marry, by all means let
him do so. If his sexual desires are strong, and his intellectual
powers not great, early marriage will keep him out of much mischief
and temptation.” He then goes on to say, what I myself hold, that
“for any one, especially a young man, to enter into a long engagement
without any immediate hope of fulfilling it, is physically an almost
unmitigated evil. It is bad for any one to have sexual ideas and
desires constantly before his mind, liable to be excited by every
interview with the lady. The frequent correspondence, further,
keeps up a morbid dwelling upon thoughts which it would be well to
banish altogether from the mind; and I have reason to know that this
condition of constant excitement has often caused most dangerous
and painful affections. These results, to an alarming extent,
often follow the progress of an ordinary courtship. The danger and
distress may be much more serious when the marriage is postponed
for years.”[30] The same evil results of hope deferred may also
be observed in the female. Physicians devoted to the study of her
diseases attribute the causation of some of them, or their increase,
to the same identical influences. Mental emotions, even in the purest
and chastest minded, are often reflected upon the reproductive
system, acting as excitants, even where the mind is unconscious of
anything like a bodily sensation; and, on the other hand, physical
excitement, which may exist unconsciously as it were, constantly
reflects itself back again upon the mind, increasing the force and
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