And Mr. Linchmore? Had his wife judged him rightly? Yes, even so. The
sad truth that she loved him not had crept slowly yet surely into his
heart, vainly as he had striven to crush it; her indifference he had
borne without resentment, hoping that in time she might be brought to
love him; for he still loved her passionately, as also sternly, almost
harshly, if I might so say. His was not a nature to change, and then his
love for her had been the one deep, intense feeling of his manhood, a
love that nothing short of death could change; but with his knowledge of
her deceit had gone his trust; and latterly almost his respect. He now
lived hoping that time might change her heart, or draw it towards him--a
hopeless wish, since the very presence of him she had wronged, and who
had innocently wrought his and her own life-long misery, was a reproach
and bitterness to her. No wonder he was severe and stern! Yet there
were times when his old impetuous nature would have sway, and shut up
in his room alone with nothing but despairing thoughts, he would pace it
in utter anguish of spirit, hoping, looking for what never could be,
namely, the love of his wife. And so they lived on. She fearing his
love. He mourning hers.
What did she care for the dark Frenchman of whom her husband had grown
jealous? and who had singled her out from among a multitude it might be
for her haughty beauty, or it might be for the _éclat_ of being thought
the favoured one of her who was the centre of admiration around which so
many flocked at Paris the winter before Amy's arrival at Brampton? He
had no intention, that man of the world, of falling in love with her; it
was a flirtation, nothing more, and cost neither a pang. That she
encouraged his attentions was without a doubt; that she despised him was
without a doubt, too, seeing his absence--for Mr. Linchmore had
positively forbidden him the house--did not cost her a sigh, not even a
thought. What mattered it if he went? there were others to pay her the
self-same attentions, others as gay and fascinating. So she went on her
way in no degree wiser or better for the obstacle she had stumbled upon
in her path, the provocation of her husband's wrath.
Flirt she must. How otherwise divert her thoughts? those thoughts that
crowded so relentlessly into her brain, threatening to overwhelm her
with the memory of the one loved and lost; him whom she had thought to
forget, or of whom she had hoped to crush out the remembrance.
Ah! her heart was not all coldness. Did she not love her children
passionately; and were not her very faults, bad as they were, caused by
the one false step--the forsaking her early love?
The storm between husband and wife blew over; it was not _outwardly_ of
long duration, and again Mrs. Linchmore singled out another--it mattered
not to her whom she flirted with. "_La belle Anglaise_"--as she was
called--cared not; life to her was a blank--a dreary waste.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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