Adultery -- Fiction; Artists -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction; Painters -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
Jenny said nothing, but went up the stairs again. In the studio she
placed her bag on the floor, and without taking off her things stood
looking at Helge while he hung up his coat and put his umbrella in the
corner.
“Father told me this morning that you had been to the office and that
mother had been below in the street.”
“Yes. It is a peculiar manner you people have—of spying, I mean. I must
say, I find it hard to get accustomed to it.”
Helge turned very red.
“Forgive me, Jenny—I _had_ to speak to you, and the porter said he was
sure you were in. You know very well that I don’t suspect _you_.”
“Really, I hardly know anything,” she said, overcome with it all. “I
cannot bear it any longer. All this suspicion and secrecy and discord.
Good heavens, Helge!—can’t you protect me from all this?”
“My poor Jenny.” He rose and went to the window, where he remained
standing with his back to her. “I have suffered more than you know. It is
all so hopeless. Can you not see for yourself that mother’s jealousy is
not without foundation?”
Jenny began to shiver. He turned round and saw it.
“I don’t believe father is aware of it himself. If he were, he would not
give in like that to his desire to be with you. But he told me himself
that we ought to go away from here, both of us. I am not so sure that
your going away now is not his idea too.”
“No; I decided myself to go to Holmestrand, but he spoke to me yesterday
about leaving town, when—when we got married.”
She went to him and put her hands on his shoulders.
“Dearest—if it is as you say, I will have to go away. Helge, Helge! What
shall we do?”
“I am going,” he said abruptly, lifting her hands from his shoulders and
pressing them against his face.
They stood a moment in silence.
“But I must go too. Can you not understand? As long as I thought your
mother absurd, even common, I could keep my countenance, but now it is
different. You should not have said it, Helge—even if you are mistaken. I
cannot go there any more with that on my mind. Whether she is justified
or not, I cannot meet her eyes. I shall not be myself, and I shall look
guilty.”
“Come,” said Helge, leading her to the sofa and sitting down beside her.
“I am going to ask you a question. Do you love me, Jenny?”
“You know I do,” she said quickly, as if frightened.
He took her cold hand between both of his: “I know you did once—though,
God knows, I never understood why. But I knew it was true when you said
so. You were loving and kind to me, and I was happy, but I was always
afraid of a time coming when you would not love me any longer.”
She looked up in his face, saying: “I am very, very fond of you, Helge.”
“I know,” he answered, with a shadow of a smile. “I don’t think you turn
cold all at once to somebody you have loved—you are not that kind. I know
that you don’t wish to make me suffer, and that you will suffer yourself
the moment you understand that you don’t love me any longer. I love you
above everything.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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