John Bull; Or, The Englishman's Fireside: A Comedy, in Five ActsColman, George
General
John Bull; Or, The Englishman's Fireside: A Comedy, in Five Acts
Colman, George
Comedy plays; English drama
_Pereg._ So it seems:--which too often teach you to over-rate the
little good you can do in it: and to shut the door when the
distressed entreat you to throw it open. But I have learnt the ways
of the world too. [_Taking out his Purse._] I shall return in a few
hours. Provide all the comforts you can; and here are a couple of
guineas, to send for any refreshments you have not in the house.
[_Giving Money._
_Dennis._ Mighty pretty handsel for the Red Cow, my lambkin!
_Mrs. Brul._ A couple of guineas! Lord, sir! if I thought you had
been such a gentleman!--Pray, miss, walk in! your poor dear, little
feet must be quite wet with our nasty roads. I beg pardon, sir; but
character's every thing in our business; and I never lose sight of
my own credit.
_Dennis._ That you don't--till you see other people's ready money.
_Pereg._ Go in, child. I shall soon be with you again.
_Mary._ You _will_ return, then, sir?
_Pereg._ Speedily. Rely on me.
_Mary._ I shall, sir;--I am sure I may. Heaven bless you, sir!
_Mrs. Brul._ This way, miss; this way! [_Courtesying._
[_Exeunt MARY and LANDLADY, into the House._
_Dennis._ Long life to your honour, for protecting the petticoats!
sweet creatures! I'd like to protect them myself, by bushels.
_Pereg._ Can you get me a guide, friend, to conduct me to Penzance?
_Dennis._ Get you a guide! There's Dan, my servant, shall skip
before you over the bogs, like a grasshopper. Oh, by the powers! my
heart's full to see your generosity, and I owe you a favour in
return:--never you call for any of my beer, till I get a fresh tap.
[_Exit into the House._
_Pereg._ Now for my friend, Thornberry; then hither again, to
interest myself in the cause of this unfortunate: for which many
would call me Quixote; many would cant out "shame!" but I care not
for the stoics, nor the puritans. Genuine nature and unsophisticated
morality, that turn disgusted from the rooted adepts in vice, have
ever a reclaiming tear to shed on the children of error. Then, let
the sterner virtues, that allow no plea for human frailty, stalk on
to paradise without me! The mild associate of my journey thither
shall be charity:--and my pilgrimage to the shrine of mercy will
not, I trust, be worse performed for having aided the weak, on my
way, who have stumbled in their progress.
_Enter DAN, from the House._
_Dan._ I be ready, zur.
_Pereg._ For what, friend?
_Dan._ Measter says you be a-going to Penzance; if you be agreeable,
I'll keep you company.
_Pereg._ Oh--the guide. You belong to the house?
_Dan._ Ees, zur; Ise enow to do: I be head waiter and hostler:--only
we never have no horses, nor customers.
_Pereg._ The path I fancy, is difficult to find. Do you never
deviate?
_Dan._ Na, zur,--I always whistles.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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