John Henry Smith: A humorous romance of outdoor lifeAdams, Frederick Upham
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John Henry Smith: A humorous romance of outdoor life
Adams, Frederick Upham
Humorous stories; Outdoor life -- Fiction
If Marshall's hope for eternal salvation depended on applying at the
pearly gates at a specified time, he would spend eternity in the other
place on account of being thirty minutes late. Knowing this to be his
habit, we always provide against it. If the club house ever catches on
fire, we shall lose Marshall, and he is a splendid good fellow.
Marshall's wife informs me it took him thirty weeks to propose after he
had made up his mind to do so, and that after the wedding day was set it
was necessary to postpone the ceremony thirty days in order to permit
him to attend to some trifling business affairs. We call him "Thirty"
Marshall, and it takes him thirty seconds to smile in appreciation of
the jest. But he plays a good game of golf, with at least four
deliberate practise swings before each stroke at the ball.
Chilvers wanted to have a team hitched up and ride over in the club bus.
He said it tired him to walk. We vetoed that proposition, and Chilvers
stopped twice to rest on the half-mile jaunt to Bishop's.
Chilvers thinks nothing of playing twice around Woodvale, a distance of
not less than ten miles, but when in the city he takes a cab or a street
car when compelled to go a few blocks. When there is no ball ahead of
him he is the most fatigued man of my acquaintance, but he can stride
over golf links from daybreak until it is so dark you cannot see the
ball, and quit as fresh as when he started. There are others like
Chilvers.
I walked with Mrs. Harding. I had a good chance to walk with Miss
Harding, but wished to show Carter that it was a matter of indifference
to me. More than that, it occurred to me it was not a bad plan to become
better acquainted with Mrs. Harding.
The man who gets Mrs. Harding for a mother-in-law will be fortunate.
None of the thrusts and jibes of the alleged funny men will apply to her
as a mother-in-law.
One would not readily identify Mrs. Harding as the wife of a famous
railway magnate. Wealth certainly has not turned her motherly head. Of
course, she is a little woman. Huge men such as Harding invariably
select dolls of women for helpmates. She is round, smiling, pretty, and
thoughtful, and I like her immensely.
We were approaching the Bishop place. The orchard trees were covered
with fruit. Some of the tomatoes showed the red of their fat cheeks
through the green of their foliage. Miss Lawrence had started with
LaHume, but under some pretext left him and was with Carter and Miss
Harding, and I doubt if Carter was pleased with that evidence of his
popularity. LaHume walked with Miss Ross and talked and laughed, but I
could see he was angry.
It suddenly occurred to me that Miss Lawrence would probably meet
Bishop's hired man, Wallace, and I presume LaHume was thinking of the
same thing. It was apparent they had quarrelled over something.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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