John Henry Smith: A humorous romance of outdoor life — John Shaqi
John Henry Smith: A humorous romance of outdoor lifeAdams, Frederick Upham
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John Henry Smith: A humorous romance of outdoor life
Adams, Frederick Upham
Humorous stories; Outdoor life -- Fiction
Marshall and Chilvers were together, their wives trailing on behind, as
usual. The way these two married men neglect these lovely women makes me
angry every time I am out with them, but the ladies do not seem to care,
and I presume it is none of my business.
Harding walked with everybody, and was happy as a lark. He threw stones
at a telegraph pole, and was in ecstasy when a lucky shot shivered one
of the glass insulators.
"How was that for a shot, mother?" he shouted, as the glass came flying
down. "Hav'n't hit one of those since I was fourteen years old. Say, I
wish I was fourteen years old now, barefooted, and sitting on the bank
of that creek catching shiners."
"I wouldn't throw any more stones, Robert," Mrs. Harding said, laying
her hand on his arm and looking up to his happy face. "The last time you
threw stones you were lame for a week, and I had to rub you with
arnica."
"But think of the fun I had," he said, and then he went back and told
Marshall and Chilvers some yarn which must have been very amusing from
the way they laughed.
I had been praising the beauties of the country around Woodmere, and
asked Mrs. Harding how she liked the club house, and if she were
enjoying her summer there.
"I would enjoy it much better," she said, "if I did not know that I
should be home."
"I presume you feel that you are neglecting your social duties," I
ventured.
"Social fiddlesticks," she laughed. "I should be home canning tomatoes
and putting up fruit. We won't have a thing in the house fit to eat all
next winter."
"But the servants," I began. "The servants----"
"If you knew as much about housekeeping as you do about golf," she said,
"you would know that servants do not know how to preserve fruit. Last
year I put up more than two hundred cans, and unless I can drag Mr.
Harding away from here, it will be too late for everything except pears
and quinces, and he does not care much for either."
Think of the wife of a multi-millionaire standing over a hot kitchen
fire and preserving tomatoes, cherries, grapes, jams, jells, and all
that kind of thing! I did not exactly know how to sympathise with her.
"It is nice down here," she said, after a pause, "but there's nothing to
do."
"The drives are splendid," I said, "and I'm sure you would become
interested in golf or tennis if you took them up."
"I mean that there's no work to do," she said. "I nearly had a row with
my husband before he would let me darn his socks. He does not know it,
but I keep the maid out of our rooms so that I can do the work myself.
It's awful to sit around all day with nothing to do but read and do
fancy work. I hate fancy work. If you have any socks which need darning,
Mr. Smith, I wish you would let me have them."
We both laughed, but she was in earnest and made me promise I would turn
over to her any socks which show signs of wear. I shall keep them as a
memento.
That is the kind of a woman I should like for a mother-in-law.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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