_Servant Gal._ "WELL, MAM--HEVERYTHINK CONSIDERED--I'M AFRAID YOU WONT SUIT ME. I'VE ALWAYS BIN BROUGHT UP GENTEEL; AND I COULDN'T GO NOWHERES WHERE THERE AIN'T NO FOOTMAN KEP'."] [Illustration: _SERVANTGALISM._--No. V. _Servant Gal (who has quarrelled with her bread-and-butter)._ "IF YOU PLEASE, MA'AM, I FIND THERE'S COLD MEAT FOR DINNER IN THE KITCHEN, DID YOU EXPECT ME TO EAT IT?" _Lady._ "OF COURSE I EXPECT YOU TO EAT IT, AND AN EXCELLENT DINNER, TOO." _Servant._ "OH, THEN, IF YOU PLEASE'M, I SHOULD LIKE TO LEAVE THIS DAY WEEK." [_Exit idiot._] [Illustration: _AT ASCOT._ THE ONLY "PARTIES" WHO ENJOYED THE WET DAY.] [Illustration: _MAKING THE BEST OF IT._ Enthusiast. "THIS IS REALLY ADMIRABLE!--I GET MY SWIM--AND A SHOWER BATH IN!"] [Illustration: _SMALL BY DEGREES, AND BEAUTIFULLY LESS._ _Shopman._ "OH, I BEG YOUR PARDON, SIR--BUT THE LADY LEFT HER PARASOL ON THE COUNTER!" _Swell._ "HAW! YA--AS--NO! THAT IS, IT'S MY UMBRELLAW. THANKS! BY JOVE! HAW!"] [Illustration: _A DRAWING-ROOM ENTERTAINMENT._] [Illustration: _THE MOUSTACHE MOVEMENT._--No. II. "MY EYE, TOM, WHAT A 'ORRID BORE IT MUST BE FOR THE HORFICER SWELLS, NOW WE'VE TOOK TO WEARIN' OUR MOOSTARCHERS. THE GALS CAN'T TELL US FROM THEM, NOW!"] [Illustration: _BATTLEDORE AND SHUTTLECOCK._ THE POPULAR AND AMUSING GAME AS AT PRESENT PLAYED IN THE PRINCIPAL THOROUGHFARES.] [Illustration: _A PLEASING DELUSION._ _Smith._ "HOLLO! POSTER, AIN'T YOU PRECIOUS DRUNK, RATHER?" _Post Boy._ "DRUNK! NOT A BIT OF IT."] [Illustration: _SERVANTGALISM._--No. VI. _Lady._ "WISH TO LEAVE? WHY, I THOUGHT, THOMPSON, YOU WERE VERY COMFORTABLE WITH ME!" _Thompson (who is extremely refined)._ "HOH YES, MAM! I DON'T FIND NO FAULT WITH YOU, MAM--NOR YET WITH MASTER--BUT THE TRUTH HIS, MAM--THE HOTHER SERVANTS IS SO 'ORRID VULGAR, AND HIGNORANT, AND SPEAKS SO HUNGRAMMATICAL, THAT I REELY CANNOT LIVE IN THE SAME 'OUSE WITH 'EM--AND I SHOULD LIKE TO GO THIS DAY MONTH, IF SO BE HAS IT WON'T ILLCONVENIENCE YOU!"] [Illustration: _THE SEA-SIDE HAT._ WHAT IS ENOUGH FOR ONE IS ENOUGH FOR TWO.] [Illustration: _HOW TO ESCAPE FROM A SCOLDING WIFE._ _Patient (inhaling Ether)._ "THIS IS REALLY QUITE DELIGHTFUL--A MOST BEAUTIFUL DREAM."] [Illustration: _A BIT OF HIS MIND._ _Edward (to his Military Cousin)._ "NO! I SHAN'T! I SHAN'T GO AND SHOOT BLACKBIRDS; AND I TELL YOU WHAT, MASTER CHARLEY, YOU DRAGOON SWELLS WON'T HAVE QUITE SUCH A PULL UPON US CIVILIANS NOW, FOR WE ARE ALL GOING TO GROW BEARDS AND MOUSTACHIOS."] [Illustration: _HOW TO GET A CONNECTION._ _Shopman (to Ancient Party)._ "YES, MISS--THANK YOU, MISS--IS THERE ANY OTHER ARTICLE, MISS?--CAN WE SEND IT FOR YOU, MISS?" [_Old Lady thinks it SUCH a nice shop, and SUCH well-behaved young men._] [Illustration: _SERVANTGALISM._--No. VII. _'Ousemaid (from Town)._ "IS HANN JENKINS AT HOME?" _Suburban Cook._ "NO, SHE HAS JUST GONE TO HER MILLINER'S!"