[Illustration: _QUITE RIDICULOUS!_ "DO YOU BELIEVE IN TABLE-TALKING, MATILDA, THAT THERE'S SUCH A FUSS ABOUT?" "OH, DEAR NO! WHY, THE OTHER EVENING A TABLE WAS ASKED HOW OLD I WAS, AND IT RAPPED OUT FORTY! WHEN I'M NOT THREE-AND-TWENTY TILL NEXT MARCH!"] [Illustration: _MAY AND DECEMBER._] [Illustration: _A VAIN SHADOW._ "MY LOVE! DO YOU THINK THOSE FELLOWS ARE FOLLOWING US?"] [Illustration: _MIND AND MATTER._ _Navvy._ "AH, BILL! IT SHOWS THE FORRARD MARCH OF THE AGE. FUST THE BRUTE FORCE, SUCH AS 'IM; AND THEN THE LIKES OF US TO DO IT SCIENTIFIC, AND SHOW THE MIGHT OF INTELLECT."] [Illustration: _SYMPATHY._ _Tailor_ (_to considerable Customer_). "TRIFLE THINNER THAN YOU WAS, SIR! GLAD TO SEE YOU BACK, SIR! 'OPE YOU'LL SOON GET YOUR HEALTH, SIR. WHEN WE HEARD YOUR REGIMENT HAD BEEN IN ACTION, SIR,--YOU MAY FANCY WHAT OUR FEELINGS WAS, SIR!"] [Illustration: _OXFORD COSTUME._ _Small Oxford Man._ "NOW, SNIP, REMEMBER, NOT SO TIGHT IN THE ARM!" _Snip._ "VERY GOOD, SIR." (_To the Clerk._) "84 AND A 'ARF!"] [Illustration: _STARTLING FACT!_ _Oxford Swell._ "DO YOU MAKE MANY OF THESE MONKEY-JACKETS, NOW?" _Snip._ "OH, DEAR YES, SIR; THERE ARE MORE MONKEYS IN OXFORD THIS TERM THAN EVER, SIR."] [Illustration: _CUPID AT SEA._ _Angelina_ (_to Edwin, whose only chance is perfect tranquillity_). "EDWIN, DEAR! IF YOU LOVE ME, GO DOWN INTO THE CABIN, AND FETCH ME MY SCENT-BOTTLE, AND ANOTHER SHAWL TO PUT OVER MY FEET!" [EDWIN'S _sensations are more easily imagined than described_. ] [Illustration: _HOW VERY EMBARRASSING!_ _Gustavus._ "MAMMA, DEAR! ARE MOUSTACHES FASHIONABLE?" _Mamma._ "WELL, GUS. I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY, BUT I BELIEVE THEY ARE." _Gus._ "OH! THEN, IS THAT THE REASON WHY MISS GRUMPH WEARS 'EM?" [MISS GRUMPH, _as well as being strong-minded, is rather masculine in appearance_. ] [Illustration: _AN ELIGIBLE PARTY._ _Juvenile._ "WELL, I KNOW WHAT I SHALL DO: I SHALL LOOK OUT FOR SOME OLD GAL WITH PLENTY OF MONEY."] [Illustration: _VERY RUDE, INDEED!_ ENTER TOM (A DISAGREEABLE BOY FROM SCHOOL.)--_Tom._ "LOOK HERE, CLARA, THERE'S A YOUNG WOMAN DOWNSTAIRS HAS BROUGHT THIS FOR YOU, AND WANTS TO KNOW IF IT WILL DO."] [Illustration: _A MAN OF CONSEQUENCE._ _Cousin Harriet._ "WELL, ALFRED, WILL YOU STOP AND HAVE SOME TEA WITH US?" _Alfred._ "HAW! YOU'RE VERY GOOD, I'M SURE; BUT I'VE GOT TO TAKE THE CHILDREN TO SEE THE PANTOMIME!"] [Illustration: _UNDER THE MISTLETOE._ AUGUSTUS THINKS CRINOLINE A DETESTABLE INVENTION.] [Illustration: _THE HUSBAND AS HE OUGHT TO BE_ _Angelina._ "WELL, LOVE, HOW DO YOU THINK I LOOK?--DO YOU LIKE THE DRESS?" _Edwin._ "I THINK IT'S PERFECTLY CHARMING.--I NEVER SAW YOU LOOK BETTER!"] _AND_ [Illustration _AND AS HE OUGHT NOT TO BE._ (_Isn't it so, my Dears?_) _Angelina._ "WELL, E.,--YOU DON'T SAY A WORD ABOUT MY DRESS?" _Edwin._ "EM, WHAT? OH, UGH!--H'M--BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL!"] [Illustration: _AS WELL BE OUT OF THE WORLD AS OUT OF THE FASHION._