_Clara._ "WHAT DOES TOMMY THINK? WHY, TOMMY HAS JUST GOT A NEW LITTLE BROTHER!" _Tommy._ "HAVE I, THOUGH? HOW JOLLY!--THERE'LL BE SOMEBODY NOW TO WEAR MY OLD CLOTHES!"] [Illustration: _SERVANTGALISM._--No. XIII. _Lady._ "THEN I SUPPOSE YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF PERFECTLY COMPETENT TO HEAR THE CHILDREN THEIR LESSONS, SHOULD THEY STAY AWAY FROM SCHOOL ANY DAY?" _Candidate for Situation._ "HOH, YES, MEM! THE FAMILY I WERE WITH, SAID I HADN'T OUGHTER BE ANYTHINK BUT A NUSSERY GUVNESS!"] [Illustration: _A FINANCIAL DIFFICULTY._ _Swell (who has received Four Penn'orth of Coppers in Change)._ "HERE! BY JOVE, YOU KNOW LOOK HERE! HI! WHAT THE DEUCE!--I SAY--WHAT AM I TO DO WITH THESE HA'PENCE, YOU KNOW?"] [Illustration: _BEWARE OF ARTILLERY WHISKERS!_ THIS IS THE CRITICAL POSITION OF LOUISA AND CAPTAIN CHARLEY BANG--HIS WHISKER CAUGHT IN HER EARRING, AND PAPA KNOCKING AT THE DOOR!] [Illustration: _SELF-IMPORTANCE._ _Small Cousin._ "DO YOU KNOW, ALICE, IT JUST OCCURS TO ME THAT THE GUARD THINKS WE ARE A RUNAWAY COUPLE!"] [Illustration: _IN SEARCH OF A VICTIM._ _Alfred._ "OH, IF YOU PLEASE, UNCLE, WE WANT TO PLAY AT BEING WILLIAM TELL; WILL YOU BE SO KIND AS TO STAND WITH THE APPLE ON YOUR HEAD?"] [Illustration: _A DIFFERENCE IN OPINION._ _Boy._ "Isn't it very naughty of papa to tell stories?" _Mamma._ "Well, dear, it would be--but what do you mean?" _Boy._ "Why, papa says, that toffee is nasty trash--and it's so very delicious, you know!"] [Illustration: _SEVERE._ _Old Lady._ "Ah thin, bad luck to ye, Grigory! Where's your manners? One would think ye was in a gintleman's house, standin' before the fire with yer coat-tails up, and ladies present, too!"] [Illustration: _LATE FROM THE SCHOOL-ROOM._ _Minnie._ "I am reading such a pretty tale." _Governess._ "You must say narrative, Minnie--not tale!" _Minnie._ "Yes, ma'am; and do just look at Muff, how he's wagging his narrative!"] [Illustration: _POSITIVE FACT, OF COURSE._ A MESSAGE COMES OFF ON MRS. BLUEBAG'S LINEN, WHICH SHE IS HANGING, AS USUAL, ON THE TELEGRAPH WIRES.] [Illustration: _A DELICATE HINT._ _Sentimental Young Lady (to Friend)._ "OH, ISN'T IT A PRETTY SIGHT TO SEE THE POOR HORSE DRINK!" _Driver (confidentially and insinuatingly)._ "SURE, THIN, IT WOULD BE A DALE PRETTIER SIGHT, MISS, TO SEE _ME_ DRINK!"] [Illustration: _THE DRAWING ROOM._ (_A stoppage of a few minutes is supposed to take place._) _Dreadful Boy (on Lamp Post)._ "Oh! My eye, Bill! 'ere's a rose-bud!"] [Illustration: _A CAUTION TO THE UNWARY._ THE READER IS REQUESTED TO OBSERVE, THAT THE LOWER EXTREMITIES REPRESENTED ABOVE DO _NOT_ BELONG TO THE FAIR DAMSEL ON THE PLANK, BUT TO THE BOATMAN BEYOND, UPON WHOSE SHOULDER SHE IS LEANING.--WE, HOWEVER, RECOMMEND FLORA TO BE MORE CAREFUL HOW SHE COMPOSES HERSELF THE NEXT TIME SHE GETS OUT OF A BOAT.] [Illustration: _THE DIGNITY OF AGE._ "SO, CHARLEY, I HEAR YOU HAVE BEEN TO A JUVENILE PARTY!"