_PECK'S CHURN, AND BRISTOW'S SOWING MASHEEN._ Theze churns are the pride ov invenshun, the genius ov improvement, a viktory over time, and a conquest ov labor. They will fetch butter from cream in 2 seckonds, from milk in 2 minnitts, and from water, inside ov a very short time. Better be without a spellin book, or even a pack of kards, in a growing family, than not tew hav one ov Peck's Churns. Peck iz a philanthropist, every housewife in the world, should put on a clean white apron, hold up both hands on high, and shout, Bully!! oh! Bully! for Peck. * * * * * Buy Bristow's double-thread, cross-stitch, rivet-seam, dovetail-hemmer, lighting-movement, krank-moshun sowing masheen. Theze masheens took all the premiums at the late lamented Paris imposishun, and one ov them, which waz sent tew a farmer in Tiogy county last fall, on trial, sowed up the whole family in a hard not, in less than three days, besides sowing fourteen acres of winter rye. 31 Days. OCTOBER. 1870. Q.--Will you pleaze to state what lies are? @ @ A.--Lies are the grease on the snaiks belly. @ [Illustration] _The yello korn now scents the gale, And harvest boys the milk maids wake, With matin songs, in praizes of, Hasty puddin, and Johnny kake._ +--+---++------------------------+-------------------------------------+ |@ | @ || _Prognostix._ | _BIRDS TRACKS._ | +--+---++------------------------+-------------------------------------+ | 1| S || @ Jack Frost @ | | | 2| G || born @ of | How menny people thare iz | | 3| M || poor but honest | whoze souls hang in them, like | | 4| T || @ @ parents @ now | the pith in a gooze quill. | | 5| W || hunt for cider @ | | | 6| T || @ moon in @ | * * * * * | | 7| F || apogee @ @ | | | 8| S || @ _air brittle_ @ | Opinyuns are like other kinds | | 9| G || snakes hang @ | ov vegetables, worth jist what | |10| M || @ up their sled | they will fetch. | |11| T || _sighns a kold_ @ @ | | |12| W || snap @ @ let her | * * * * * | |13| T || snap @ @ begin | | |14| F || yure promiskuss | When a man gits so reduced | |15| S || sparking @ @ @ | that he kant help ennyboddy else, | |16| G || @ @ knowledge iz | we then vote him a penshun for | |17| M || power @ pumpkin | the rest ov hiz life, by calling him| |18| T || pies begin @ | a _poor devil_. | |19| W || tew loaf @ @ | | |20| T || around @ @ | * * * * * |