THE GOOD-NATURED MAN. Good nature is not an accomplishment, (that is it is not one of them kind ov collaterals, that kan be manufakterd,) it is one ov the virtews, which a man gits, just as he dus his nose, bi having it born with him. It is really worth more tew the world, tew hav a good natured man born into it, and go into the good natured bissness, than to hav a poeck born, and go into the poeckry bissness. Good natur is what evry man kan understand, but there is a good deal of poeckry that noboddy kan understand, and if they did, they wouldn't be enny the wiser for it. Good natured men work up into fathers, husbands, and brothers, fust rate, and without enny waste; they make good feller citizens, and evry boddy feels as if they had some stock in them; little children love them, and the girls ain't afrade tew be kist by them; they are as safe and as pleasant as root beer. The good-natured man aint alwus a statesman, nor aint alwus just the man for sekretary ov the treasury, but to grease the griddle ov evry day life, tew soften the furious, tew raise the despondent, and tew endorse 60 day paper, he weighs at least a ton. I had rather be a good natured man than tew hav a seat in the New York Legislature; thare may not be as mutch money in it, but thare is twice the means ov grace. LXIX. PHILOSOPHEE ON THE HALF SHELL. I hav finally cum tew the conclusion that thare aint truth enuff in the world, just now, to do the bissiness with, and if sum kind ov compromise cant be had, the Devil might as well step in, and run the consarn at onst. * * * * * I always advise short sermons, espeshily on a hot Sunday. If a minister cant strike ile in boring 40 minutes, he has either got a poor gimblet, or else he is a boring in the rong plase. * * * * * Don't tell the world yure sorrows, enny more than you would tell them your shame. * * * * * Philosophers are like graveyards--they take all things just as they come, and give them a decent burial and a suitable epitaff. * * * * * Enny boddy can tell where lightning struck last, but it takes a smart man tew find out whare it is going tew strike nex time--this is one ov the differences between learning and wisdom. * * * * * Sailors heave the lead for the purpose ov finding the bottom, not for the purpose ov going thare--it is sum so with advise; men should ask for it, not so mutch for the purpose ov following it, as for the purpose ov strengthening their own plans. * * * * * I have got a first rate recollekshun, but no memory--I can recolleckt distinctly ov loseing a 10 Dollar bill onse, but cant remember whare, to save mi life. * * * * *