The best edukashun a man receives in this life, he gits just before he dize, and it mostly consists in forgetting what he haz larnt before. The world looks with kold respek upon an ackt ov justiss, but heave up their hats at a display ov mersy. Yet the one iz the strength ov virtue, while the other iz most often its gratest weakness. A mind that haz more imaginashun than sense iz like a goose--fust rate tew fli down hill. I don't think the world haz enny Civilizashun tew spare, but i think she haz more than she kan manage well. Poetri, tew be excellent, wants tew be like natur, but about 4 times az big. V. GOOSE TALK. The goose is a grass-animal but don't chaw her cud. They are good livers; about one aker to a goose iz enuff, altho there iz sum folks who thinks one goose tew 175 akers, is nearer right. These two calculations are so fur apart, it iz difficult tew tell now, which will finally win. But i don't think, if i had a farm ov 175 akers, awl paid for, that i would sell it for half what it was worth, just bekauze it didn't hav but one goose on it. Geese stay well; sum ov our best biographers say, 70 years, and grow tuff tew the last. They lay one egg at once, about the size of a goose egg, in which the gosling lies hidd. The gosling iz the goose's babe. The goose don't suckle hiz young, but turns him out tew pasture on sumboddy's vacant lot. They seem tew lack wisdum, but are considered generally sound on the goose. They are good eating, but not good chawing; the reason ov this remains a profound sekret to this day. When the femail goose iz at work hatching, she iz a hard bird tew pleaze; she riles clear up from the bottom in a minnit, and will fight a yoke ov oxen, if they show her the least bit ov sass. The geese iz excellent for feathers, which she sheds every year by the handful. They are also amphibicuss, besides several other kinds ov cuss. But they are mostly cureiss about one thing: they kan haul one leg up into their body, and stand on tuther, awl day, and not tutch ennything with their hands. I take notis, thare ain't but darn few men kan dew this. VI. JOSH BILLINGS: HIZ SHADE TREE. Sum fu years ago, when i want so old nor near so hansum az i am now, i waz a feller citizen in one ov the sudden towns, which during the past 25 years, hav fairly sprung up, az it were, by necromancy, in the western country. At that time I waz verry ritch and owned a house, and lot. At one corner, on mi lot, stood, or rather leaned, a tree, az awkward az a shanghi rusetor; it bent at least 3 different ways, and its limbs were az sprawling az tho it had bin born in a nort-west storm. I had sum pride in them days, and longed to put that shade tree out ov misery.