When I was a young man, I was an enthusiast. My mother had died when I
was a child. My father was a clergyman, and wished to educate me for
the church. But my heart was not in my studies, and I did not satisfy
his expectations. I was too fond of poetry and plays, my tutors told
him; sterner studies were distasteful to me, and they met with nothing
but disappointment from so unwilling a pupil. I was also difficult to
control; would indeed submit to no control. On several occasions when
a company of players came to the place in which I was being educated,
I had stolen away to the theatre, remaining there until nearly
midnight. My tutors spoke the truth. From the first night that I
stepped inside the walls of a theatre and saw a tragedy, my fate was
fixed. I was fascinated, entranced. I had never conceived any thing so
grand, so noble, so heroic. Mine was a pure passion; glitter possibly
had its effect upon my mind, but no base ingredient was mixed with my
determination to become an actor. What nobler calling could there be
than that which clothed the noblest of all the arts with living fire,
which made dead heroes speak and move and live again? My father
received the report with displeasure. He looked upon a theatre as the
abode of all the vices. He spoke to me and expostulated with me, and I
argued with him until I angered him. Then he took me from school, and
kept me at home, so that he might wean me from my wicked notions. I
had not been home a month before a company of players paid our town a
visit. I was aglow with excitement. My father warned me not to go; I
told him frankly that I would. He locked me in my bedroom; and I made
a rope of the sheets, and let myself out of the window. I came home
late, and my father opened the door for me. He was so strict a
disciplinarian, that my disobedience was a crime in his eyes. He told
me so sternly, and told me also that unless I complied with the rules
of his house, and with his commands as a father, I must find a home
elsewhere. He had other children, and he declared that I should not
contaminate them by my example. When I ventured to expostulate with
him, he stopped me peremptorily. There was no sign of tenderness in
his manner. He was harsh and hard. He forgot that I inherited some
share of his own determination, and that I was as likely to be
immovable in my ideas as he was in his. I felt that I could have
answered him by arguments as forcible as his, and, with the not
uncommon egotism of youth, I believed that I could have convinced him.
But he would not listen to me, and I was compelled to sit silent and
inwardly rebellious while he laid down the hard rules by which my life
was to be guided. The glittering splendor of the play I had witnessed
that night was vivid to my mind while his cold words fell upon my
ears. The tragedian upon whose musical impassioned utterances I had
hung entranced, was one of the greatest that ever trod the stage; the
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