Of course it was all necessary, the conscription, the medical
examinations. Of course, of course. We all know it. But when it comes to
the deepest things, men are as entirely irrational as women. You can
reason with a sex-angry woman till you are black in the face. And if for
a time you _do_ overcome her with reason, the sex-anger only arises more
hideously and furiously, later. Perhaps in another guise.
There is no arguing with the instinctive passional self. Not the least
use in the world. Yes, you are quite right, quite right in all your
contentions. _But!_ And the _But_ just explodes everything like a bomb.
The conscription, all the whole performance of the war was absolutely
circumstantially necessary. It was necessary to investigate even the
secret parts of a man. Agreed! Agreed! _But_--
It was _necessary_ to put Richard Lovat and the ugly collier through
that business at Derby. Many men were put through things a thousand
times worse. Agreed! Oh, entirely agreed! The war couldn’t be lost, at
that hour. Quite, quite, quite! Even Richard, even now, agreed fully to
all these contentions. _But_--!
And there you are. _But_--. He was full of a lava fire of rage and hate,
at the bottom of his soul. And he knew it was the same with most men. He
felt desecrated. And he knew it was the same with most men. He felt
sold. And he knew most men felt the same.
He cared for nothing now, but to let loose the hell-rage that was in
him. Get rid of it by letting it out. For there was no digesting it. He
had been trying that for three years, and roaming the face of the earth
trying to soothe himself with the sops of travel and new experience and
scenery. He knew now the worth of all sops. Once that disruption had
taken place in a man’s soul, and in a stress of humiliation, under the
presence of _compulsion_, something has broken in his tissue and the
liquid fire has run out loose into his blood, then no sops will be of
any avail. The lava-fire at the bottom of a man’s belly breeds more lava
fire, and more, and more--till there is an eruption. As the lava fire
accumulates, the man becomes more and more reckless. Till he reaches a
pitch of dehumanised recklessness, and then the lid is blown off, as
the top is blown off a hill to make a new volcano. Or else it all sets
into rocky deadness.
Richard felt himself reaching the volcanic pitch. He had as good as
reached it. And he realised that the Russians must have reached it
during the war: that the Irish had got there: that the Indians in India
were approaching the point: that the whole world was gradually working
up to the pitch. The whole world. It was as inevitable as the coming of
summer. It might be soon--it might be slow. But inevitable it was. Or
else the alternative, the dead-rock barrenness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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