Letters on the Improvement of the Mind, Addressed to a LadyChapone, Mrs. (Hester)
Religion
Letters on the Improvement of the Mind, Addressed to a Lady
Chapone, Mrs. (Hester)
Women -- Education; Young women -- Conduct of life
Peevishness, though not so violent and fatal in its immediate effects,
is still more unamiable than passion, and, if possible, more destructive
of happiness, inasmuch as it operates more continually. Though the
fretful man injures us less, he disgusts us more than the passionate
one; because he betrays a low and little mind, intent on trifles, and
engrossed by a paltry self-love, which knows not how to bear the very
apprehension of any inconvenience. It is self-love then, which we must
combat, when we find ourselves assaulted by this infirmity; and, by
voluntarily induring inconveniences, we shall habituate ourselves to
bear them with ease and good-humour, when occasioned by others. Perhaps
this is the best kind of religious mortification; as the chief end of
denying ourselves any innocent indulgences, must be to acquire a habit
of command over our passions and inclinations, particularly such as are
likely to lead us into evil. Another method of conquering this enemy, is
to abstract our minds from that attention to trifling circumstances,
which usually creates this uneasiness. Those, who are engaged in high
and important pursuits, are very little affected by small
inconveniences. The man, whose head is full of studious thought, or
whose heart is full of care, will eat his dinner without knowing whether
it was well or ill dressed, or whether it was served punctually at the
hour or not: and though absence from the common things of life is far
from desirable--especially in a woman--yet too minute and anxious an
attention to them seldom fails to produce a teasing, mean, and fretful
disposition. I would therefore wish your mind to have always some object
in pursuit worthy of it, that it may not be engrossed by such as are in
themselves scarce worth a moment's anxiety. It is chiefly in the decline
of life, when amusements fail, and when the more importunate passions
subside, that this infirmity is observed to grow upon us; and perhaps it
will seldom fail to do so, unless carefully watched, and counteracted by
reason. We must then endeavour to substitute some pursuits in the place
of those, which can only engage us in the beginning of our course. The
pursuit of glory and happiness in another life, by every means of
improving and exalting our own minds, becomes more and more interesting
to us, the nearer we draw to the end of all sublunary enjoyments.
Reading, reflection, rational conversation, and, above all, conversing
with God, by prayer and meditation, may preserve us from taking that
anxious interest in the little comforts and conveniences of our
remaining days, which usually gives birth to so much fretfulness in old
people. But though the aged and infirm are most liable to this evil--and
they alone are to be pitied for it--yet we sometimes see the young, the
healthy, and those who enjoy most outward blessings, inexcusably guilty
of it. The smallest disappointment in pleasure, or difficulty in the
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