Life in the sick-room : $b EssaysMartineau, Harriet
Science
Life in the sick-room : $b Essays
Martineau, Harriet
Conduct of life; Sick
rocks, after this magnanimous deed. How glad should I be if this page
should ever meet the eye of any one of them, and strike a late remorse
into them! To me the incident brought back the passions of my
childhood--the shock I have never got over to this hour--on reading that
too torturing story of Miss Edgeworth’s, about the footman, who “broke
off all the bobbins, and put them in his pocket, rolled the
weaving-pillow down the dirty lane, jumped up behind his lady’s
carriage, and was out of sight in an instant.” I think these must be the
words, for they burnt themselves in upon my childish brain, and have
stirred me with passion many a time since; as this harlequin adventure
will ever do.
Many will wonder at all this--will despise such sensitiveness to
trifles, considering what deeds are done every day in the world. They do
not know the pains and penalties of sickness--that is all: and it may do
them no harm to learn what they are, while my fellow-sufferers may find
some comfort in an honest recognition of them.
This sensitiveness takes worse directions, however, and inflicts more
misery still. It subjects some of us to a scrupulosity, particularly
about truth, which brings endless troubles. Every mistake of fact that
we happen to know of afflicts us as if we were responsible for it,--and
more than it ought if we were so responsible. We tend to an absurd
restlessness to set everything right; and of course, above all, what
concerns ourselves. If any kind friend pities us too much, and praises
us for our patience under sufferings which he supposes to be greater
than we are actually enduring, we remonstrate, and explain, as if his
sympathy were not good for him and us, at any rate; and as if, having
told only truth ourselves, it could matter much how our troubles are
rated--whether over or under. We call up images of all who suffer far
more than ourselves, and implore him to go and pity them--to honour them
and not us. If he smiles and answers, well, he will go and pity and
honour them--but he must be sorry for us, too--we smile, also, at our
own scrupulosity, though we see in it only a new symptom of disease.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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