England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English; River life -- Fiction
“‘It ain’t bad for a fo’c’s’le,’ ses Charlie.
“‘An’ what’s that in that bunk over there?’ ses Dodgy, pointing with
’is cigar at Joe.
“‘Hush, be careful,’ ses Tom, with a wink; ‘that’s a prize-fighter.’
“‘Oh,’ ses Dodgy, grinning, ‘I thought it was a monkey.’
“You might ’ave heard a pin drop, and there was a pleasant feeling went
all over us at the thought of the little fight we was going to see all
to ourselves, as Joe lays down the jacket he was stitching at and just
puts ’is little ’ead over the side o’ the bunk.
“‘Bill,’ he ses, yawning.
“‘Well,’ ses Bill, all on the grin like the rest of us.
“‘Who is that ’andsome, gentlemanly-looking young feller over there
smoking a half-crown cigar?’ ses Joe.
“That’s a young gent wot’s come down to ’ave a look round,’ ses Tom, as
Dodgy takes ’is cigar out of ’is mouth and looks round, puzzled.
“‘Wot a terror ’e must be to the gals, with them lovely little peepers
of ’is,’ ses Joe, shaking ’is ’ead. ‘_Bill_!’
“‘Well,’ ses Bill, agin, as Dodgy got up.
“‘Take that lovely little gentleman and kick ’im up the fo’c’s’le
ladder,’ ses Joe, taking up ’is jacket agin; ‘and don’t make too much
noise over it, cos I’ve got a bit of a ’eadache, else I’d do it
myself.’
“There was a laugh went all round then, and Tom Baker was near killing
himself, and then I’m blessed if Bill didn’t get up and begin taking
off ’is coat.
“‘Wot’s the game?’ ses Dodgy, staring.
“‘I’m obeying orders,’ ses Bill. ‘Last time I was in London, Joe ’ere
half killed me one time, and ’e made me promise to do as ’e told me for
six months. I’m very sorry, mate, but I’ve got to kick you up that
ladder.’
“‘You kick me up?’ ses Dodgy, with a nasty little laugh.
“‘I can try, mate, can’t I?’ ses Bill, folding ’is things up very neat
and putting ’em on a locker.
“‘’Old my cigar,’ ses Dodgy, taking it out of ’is mouth and sticking it
in Charlie’s. ‘I don’t need to take my coat off to ’im.’
“’E altered ’is mind, though, when he saw Bill’s chest and arms, and
not only took off his coat, but his waistcoat too. Then, with a nasty
look at Bill, ’e put up ’is fists and just pranced up to ’im.
“The fust blow Bill missed, and the next moment ’e got a tap on the jaw
that nearly broke it, and that was followed up by one in the eye that
sent ’im staggering up agin the side, and when ’e was there Dodgy’s
fists were rattling all round ’im.
“I believe it was that that brought Bill round, and the next moment
Dodgy was on ’is back with a blow that nearly knocked his ’ead off.
Charlie grabbed at Tom’s watch and began to count, and after a little
bit called out ‘Time.’ It was a silly thing to do, as it would ’ave
stopped the fight then and there if it ’adn’t been for Tom’s presence
of mind, saying it was two minutes slow. That gave Dodgy a chance, and
he got up again and walked round Bill very careful, swearing ’ard at
the small size of the fo’c’s’le.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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