Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
Mr. Lincoln said that this reminded him of an old acquaintance of his,
“Jack” Chase, a lumberman on the Illinois, a steady, sober man, and the
best raftsman on the river. It was quite a trick to take the logs over
the rapids; but he was skilful with a raft, and always kept her straight
in the channel. Finally a steamer was put on, and “Jack” was made
captain of her. He always used to take the wheel, going through the
rapids. One day when the boat was plunging and wallowing along the
boiling current, and “Jack’s” utmost vigilance was being exercised to
keep her in the narrow channel, a boy pulled his coat-tail and hailed
him with:
“Say, Mister Captain! I wish you would just stop your boat a
minute--I’ve lost my apple overboard!”
LOST HIS CERTIFICATE OF CHARACTER.
Mr. Lincoln prepared his first inaugural address in a room over a
store in Springfield. His only reference works were Henry Clay’s
great compromise speech of 1850, Andrew Jackson’s Proclamation against
Nullification, Webster’s great reply to Hayne, and a copy of the
Constitution.
When Mr. Lincoln started for Washington, to be inaugurated, the inaugural
address was placed in a special satchel and guarded with special care.
At Harrisburg the satchel was given in charge of Robert T. Lincoln, who
accompanied his father. Before the train started from Harrisburg the
precious satchel was missing. Robert thought he had given it to a waiter
at the hotel, but a long search failed to reveal the missing satchel
with its precious document. Lincoln was annoyed, angry, and finally in
despair. He felt certain that the address was lost beyond recovery, and,
as it only lacked ten days until the inauguration, he had no time to
prepare another. He had not even preserved the notes from which the
original copy had been written.
Mr. Lincoln went to Ward Lamon, his former law partner, then one of his
bodyguards, and informed him of the loss in the following words:
“Lamon, I guess I have lost my certificate of moral character, written
by myself. Bob has lost my gripsack containing my inaugural address.” Of
course, the misfortune reminded him of a story.
“I feel,” said Mr. Lincoln, “a good deal as the old member of the
Methodist Church did when he lost his wife at the camp meeting, and
went up to an old elder of the church and asked him if he could tell him
whereabouts in h--l his wife was. In fact, I am in a worse fix than my
Methodist friend, for if it were only a wife that were missing, mine
would be sure to bob up somewhere.”
The clerk at the hotel told Mr. Lincoln that he would probably find his
missing satchel in the baggage-room. Arriving there, Mr. Lincoln saw a
satchel which he thought was his, and it was passed out to him. His key
fitted the lock, but alas! when it was opened the satchel contained
only a soiled shirt, some paper collars, a pack of cards and a bottle of
whisky. A few minutes later the satchel containing the inaugural address
was found among the pile of baggage.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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