Lincolniana; Or, The Humors of Uncle AbeAdderup, Andrew
General
Lincolniana; Or, The Humors of Uncle Abe
Adderup, Andrew
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
When the Illinois boys gathered at Springfield, under the call of the
ten regiment bill, they were quartered on the fair grounds, just out
of the city. All the stalls were filled with troops, before which were
signs as "St. Nicholas," "Richmond House," etc., etc. Charley W------,
on going through the fair grounds, looked into the "Richmond House," and
said--
"Well, boys, how do you get along?"
"Oh, first rate," replied the Chicagoians, "we're all _stall fed_."
"Bully for you," said Charley; "hope you'll be too tough for the
rebels."
Little Mac Helped by an Illustration.
"I can't seem to reap any advantage from the rebel movements," said
McClellan, in consultation with Uncle Abe.
"Oh, you just keep a watchful, careful eye on Leer and perhaps you will
yet see how to make use of them, as old Mother Grundy did of her crooked
wood."
"Thereby hangs a tale," remarked little Mac, with one of his peculiar,
quaint smiles.
"You're right, General. Your remark reminded me of a good old
neighbor of my father's, in Kentucky, who died many years ago. She was
sweet-tempered--few such in this world." Uncle Abe stopped as though a
mental comparison had damaged some woman of his acquaintance. "Yes, her
disposition was of that kind that extracts 'good from things evil.' And
she was her husband's pride and boast. One day he was praising her to a
neighbor."
"'Look here, old man Grundy,' said the neighbor 'these women are just
like cats--they are all right as long as you stroke the fur the right
way, but reverse the movement, and you'll see the fire fly. Now, I'll
tell you what, I bet a four-gallon keg of my four-year-old peach, that I
can tell you how to make her as mad as a set-hen, if you dare to try."
"'Done,' cried old man Grundy.
"'Well, you just haul home all the crookedest sticks of wood you can
find, and then see.'
"Old man Grundy brought home a small load every day or two, and it was
knotty and crooked as a pigs-tail; but not a word or look of complaint.
For a week this continued, with the same result, when he asked the good
wife how she liked the wood."
"'Oh,'tis beautiful wood,' said she; 'it burns finely, and then it fits
_around my pots and kettles just, as if 'twas made on purpose_.'"
Lee did not fit into Mac's hand so well, yet the story was not without
its use to him.
An Acre of Fight.
During the progress of the Senatorial campaign between Douglas and
Lincoln, Uncle Abe came home to recreate a few days. Douglas, long used
to the political arena, bore the fatigues of the canvass like a veteran.
His custom was to bathe just after supper, getting some friend to rub
him like a race horse, when he would sit down and enjoy his whisky
and cigar. Lincoln, lank and abstemious, bore his yoke with evident
weariness. But to the story.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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