’You hear this, gentlemen?’ said counsel, turning to the jury. ’According to this man’s evidence, a boat, laden with valuable merchandize, is left in charge of a dog! And, guilty of such contributory negligence, this man has the impudence to come into court and claim compensation and damages!’ And, turning to the witness again: ’Was your boat attached to a landing-stage?’ ’No; to a buoy.’ ’A boy! These are curious revelations. A mere boy is made to hold the boat! And where was the boy?’ ’Why, in the water, of course!’ ’This is getting more strange every moment. The poor boy is actually kept standing in the water whilst he is holding the boat! I had no idea such cruelties were practised in the shipping—shipping interest. The Legislature should see to this.’ Then, fumbling among his papers, counsel went on: ’You said, when questioned by my learned friend, that you had gone on shore? Why did you go on shore?’ ’To get a man to bleed the buoy. It wanted bleeding very much.’ ’You went to get a surgeon, you mean?’ ’No; a workman from the yard.’ ’What, to bleed a boy! To perform so delicate an operation on a boy, then standing in the water, and, in the state of health he was in, no doubt in great pain, whilst holding the boat all the time—shocking inhumanity!’ Here judge and jury thought it time to interfere. They all knew the meaning of the technical terms; but as they enjoyed the fun of seeing counsel getting deeper and deeper into the mire, they allowed him to go on, and the court being full of sailors, who cheered counsel vociferously as he stumbled from blunder to blunder, the trial was one of the most amusing in that court, and gave judge and jury a splendid appetite for their lunch.