England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Wives -- Fiction
"But why must your life be a weary march?" I asked, forgetting my usual
cold caution in his presence. "Why should there not be a Canaan for you
as well as for others?"
"Can you ask? No, Mrs. Hepburne, I will not sadden you with any story
of myself and my lot. Believe me, my greatest desire is to see you and
Ronald happy. I have no stronger interest in life than this."
I was beginning to believe in him. The sight of those two figures
strolling ahead of us under the trees had begun to confuse my powers of
judgment. I ceased to remember, at that moment, the William Greystock
who had come to Lady Waterville's; the hard, bitter man, whose true
nature had been revealed to me in many little ways, and who had never
yet, in spite of apparent friendship, rendered any real service to
Ronald. It seemed to be a new and softer Greystock who was walking by
my side, and speaking in this quiet, melancholy voice.
Moreover, the burning pain in my heart, and the ache of my weary head,
were fast bewildering my reasoning faculties; and I even began to ask
myself whether I had ever known the true Ronald at all? Perhaps he had
never loved me; or his love might only have been of that spurious kind
which is the outcome of a disappointment.
It is a true saying that nature abhors a void; and many a hasty
marriage has been brought about by the dethronement of an old love. Had
Ronald taken me only because he wanted to fill up an empty place in his
life?
I ought to have known him too well to have asked this foolish question
of my own heart; but there are times when our best beloved seem to
present a new aspect to our eyes. I could still see those two figures
under the trees; they gave no sign of turning back, or of waiting for
the others to come up with them. There was a pause after my companion's
last words; and all at once I remembered that they were kind words, and
called for a reply.
"We have done nothing to deserve your interest in us, Mr. Greystock,"
I said, sadly. "What are we but a silly young couple who despised the
counsel of friends? I almost wonder why you should feel so kindly."
"I have very few people to care for," he answered. "As to Ronald, you
know we are half relations. I wish, however, that I had more influence
with him."
"I thought you always influenced him," I said, in surprise. "He quotes
you constantly, and seems to be guided by your advice." Glancing at Mr.
Greystock as I spoke, I saw him quietly shake his head.
"If I could guide Ronald," he began, and then suddenly broke off, and
looked away towards the strolling couple.
My jealous heart finished the incomplete sentence. I was sure that he
meant to add something about the intimacy with Ida Lorimer; and yet,
if he disapproved of that intimacy, why was Ida at Richmond that day?
But perhaps she had been invited at my husband's urgent request; and if
this were so, Ronald's vexation at my acceptance of the invitation was
explained.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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