London (England) -- Fiction; Love stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; May-December romances -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction
He stood staring round him, and telling himself that he knew how it had
happened--oh yes, he could see it all--how at the moment of George’s
death Catherine, flooded with pity, with grief, perhaps with love now
that she was no longer obliged to love, had clung on to his
arrangements, not suffering a thing to be touched or moved or altered,
pathetically anxious to keep it exactly as he used to, to keep him still
alive at least in his furniture. Other widows he had heard of had done
this; and widowers--but fewer of them--had done it too. He could imagine
it easily, if one loved some one very much, or was desperately sorry
because one hadn’t. But to go on year after year? Yet, once one had
begun, how stop? There was only one way to stop happily and naturally,
and that was to marry again.
And then, as he was looking round, his nose lifted in impatient scorn of
George’s post-mortem persistence, and quite prepared to see whisky and
cigars, grown dusty, on some table in a corner--why not? they would only
be in keeping with all the rest--he caught sight of a little white
object on the heavy sofa at right angles to a fireplace in which feebly
flickered the minutest of newly lit fires. A bit of her. A trace, at
last, of her.
He darted across and pounced on it. Soft, white, sweet with the
sweetness he had noticed when he was near her, it was a small fox fur, a
thing a woman puts round her neck.
He snatched it up, and held it to his face. How like her, how like her.
He was absorbed in it, buried in it, breathing its delicate sweet smell;
and Catherine, coming in quietly with her latchkey, saw him like this,
over there by the sofa with his back to the door.
She stood quiet in the doorway, watching him with surprised amusement,
because it seemed so funny. Really, to have this sort of thing happening
to one’s boa at one’s age! Queer young man. Perhaps having all that
flaming red hair made one....
But, though he had heard no sound, he was aware of her, and turned round
quickly, and caught her look of amusement, and flushed a deep red.
He put the fur carefully down on the sofa again and came over to her.
‘Well, why shouldn’t I?’ he said defiantly, throwing back his head.
She laughed and shook hands and said she was very glad he had come. She
was so easy, so easy; taking things so much as a matter of course,
things that were so little a matter of course that they made him
tremble--things like drying her shoes the night before in the taxi, or
feeling on his face the soft white fur. If she would be shy, be
self-conscious for even an instant, he thought, he would be more master
of himself as well as of her. But she wasn’t. Not a trace of it. Just
simple friendliness, as if everything he said and did was usual, was
inevitable, was what she quite expected, or else didn’t matter one way
or the other. She wasn’t even surprised to see him. Yet he had assured
her he never could get away on Saturdays.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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