England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Drama; Mistaken identity -- Drama
_Tredwell_ (_receiving_ PHILLIPSON). Lady Maisie's maid, I presume?
I'm the butler here--Mr. Tredwell. Your ladies arrived some time back.
I'll take you to the housekeeper, who'll show you their rooms, and
where yours is, and I hope you'll find everything comfortable. (_In an
undertone, indicating_ UNDERSHELL, _who is awaiting recognition in the
doorway_.) Do you happen to know who it is _with_ you?
_Phillipson_ (_in a whisper_). I can't quite make him out--he's so
flighty in his talk. But he _says_ he belongs to some Mews or other.
_Tredwell._ Oh, then _I_ know who he is. We expect him right enough.
He's a partner in a crack firm of Vets. We've sent for him special.
I'd better see to him, if you don't mind finding your own way to the
housekeeper's room, second door to the left, down that corridor.
(PHILLIPSON _departs_.) Good evening to you, Mr.--ah--Mr.----?
_Undershell_ (_coming forward_). Mr. Undershell. Lady Culverin expects
me, I believe.
_Tredwell._ Quite correct, Mr. Undershell, sir. She do. Leastwise, I
shouldn't say myself she'd require to see you--well, not _before_
to-morrow morning--but you won't mind _that_, I dare say.
_Undershell_ (_choking_). Not mind that! Take me to her at once!
_Tredwell._ Couldn't take it on myself, sir, really. There's no
particular 'urry. I'll let her ladyship know you're 'ere; and if she
wants you, she'll send for you; but, with a party staying in the
'ouse, and others dining with us to-night, it ain't likely as she'll
have time for you till to-morrow.
_Undershell._ Oh, then whenever her ladyship should find leisure to
recollect my existence, will you have the goodness to inform her that
I have taken the liberty of returning to town by the next train?
_Tredwell._ Lor! Mr. Undershell, you aren't so pressed as all _that_,
are you? I know my lady wouldn't like you to go without seeing you
personally; no more wouldn't Sir Rupert. And I understood you was
coming down for the Sunday!
_Undershell_ (_furious_). So did _I_--but not to be treated like this!
_Tredwell_ (_soothingly_). Why, _you_ know what ladies are. And you
couldn't see Deerfoot--not properly, to-night, either.
_Undershell._ I have seen enough of this place already. I intend to go
back by the next train, I tell you.
_Tredwell._ But there _ain't_ any next train up to-night--being a loop
line--not to mention that I've sent the fly away, and they can't spare
no one at the stables to drive you in. Come, sir, make the best of it.
I've had my horders to see that you're made comfortable, and Mrs.
Pomfret and me will expect the pleasure of your company at supper in
the 'ousekeeper's room, 9.30 sharp. I'll send the steward's room boy
to show you to your room.
[_He goes, leaving_ UNDERSHELL _speechless_.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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