Mademoiselle de Maupin, Volume 2 (of 2)Gautier, Théophile
General
Mademoiselle de Maupin, Volume 2 (of 2)
Gautier, Théophile
French fiction -- Translations into English
unfailing solicitude, you pressed so tenderly the hand I abandoned to
you, your eyes were so languorous when you raised them to mine: if you
did not love me, why all that manœuvring? Can it be that you are cruel
enough to kindle love in a heart in order to laugh at it afterward? Ah!
that would be a ghastly joke, impious and sacrilegious! only a wicked
soul could be amused by it, and I cannot believe it of you, however
inexplicable your conduct toward me. What is the cause, then, of this
sudden change? As for me, I can imagine none.--What mystery is hidden
by such coldness?--I cannot believe that you feel repugnance for me;
what you have done proves that you do not, for a man does not pay court
so earnestly to a woman for whom he has a feeling of disgust, though
he were the greatest scoundrel on earth. O Théodore, what have you
against me? what has changed you so? what have I done to you?--If the
love you seemed to have for me has vanished, mine, alas! has remained,
and I cannot tear it from my heart.--Have pity on me, Théodore, for
I am very unhappy.--At least pretend to love me a little, and say a
few kind words to me; they will not cost you much, unless you have an
insurmountable horror of me."
At that pathetic point in her discourse, sobs completely choked her
voice; she clasped her hands on my shoulder and rested her forehead
upon them in an attitude of utter despair. All that she said was
absolutely true, and I had nothing to say in reply.--I could not treat
the matter as a jest. That would not have been decent.--Rosette was
not one of the creatures one can treat so lightly; besides, I was too
deeply touched to be able to do it. I felt guilty for having thus made
a plaything of a charming woman's heart, and I was seized with the
deepest and most sincere remorse.
Seeing that I made no reply, the dear child drew a long breath and made
a movement as if to rise, but she fell back, crushed by her emotion;
then she threw her arms about me--I could feel their cool touch through
my doublet--laid her face against mine and began to weep silently.
It produced a strange effect upon me to feel that exhaustless
current of tears that did not flow from my own eyes, rolling down my
cheeks.--Mine were soon mingling with them, and there was a veritable
rain of bitter tears, violent enough to cause another deluge, if it had
lasted forty days.
At that instant the moon shone fairly on the window; a pale beam shot
into the room and cast a bluish gleam upon our silent group.
With her white _peignoir_, her bare arms, her uncovered throat and
breast, of almost the same color as the linen, her dishevelled hair and
her sorrowful expression, Rosette had the aspect of an alabaster figure
of Melancholy sitting on a tomb. As for myself, I have no very clear
idea what I may have looked like, as I could not see myself and there
was no mirror to reflect my image, but I fancy that I might very well
have posed for a statue of Uncertainty personified.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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