DOCTOR. [_Puts down his cigar in the ash-tray._] The Duke is indescribable. He will be here presently, and you shall judge for yourself. Put two or three facts or ideas before him, and the thing he makes out of them is always something that seems to have nothing to do with it. Tell any other human being about a girl dreaming of the fairies and her practical brother from America, and he would settle it in some obvious way and satisfy some one: send her to America or let her have her fairies in Ireland. Now the Duke thinks a conjurer would just meet the case. I suppose he vaguely thinks it would brighten things up, and somehow satisfy the believers' interest in supernatural things and the unbelievers' interest in smart things. As a matter of fact the unbeliever thinks the conjurer's a fraud, and the believer thinks he's a fraud, too. The conjurer satisfies nobody. That is why he satisfies the Duke. [_Enter the_ DUKE, _with_ HASTINGS, _carrying papers. The_ DUKE _is a healthy, hearty man in tweeds, with a rather wandering eye. In the present state of the peerage it is necessary to explain that the_ DUKE, _though an ass, is a gentleman._ DUKE. Good-morning, Mr. Smith. So sorry to have kept you waiting, but we're rather in a rush to-day. [_Turns to_ HASTINGS, _who has gone over to a table with the papers._] You know Mr. Carleon is coming this afternoon? HASTINGS. Yes, your Grace. His train will be in by now. I have sent the trap. DUKE. Thank you. [_Turning to the other two._] My nephew, Dr. Grimthorpe, Morris, you know, Miss Carleon's brother from America. I hear he's been doing great things out there. Petrol, or something. Must move with the times, eh? DOCTOR. I'm afraid Mr. Smith doesn't always agree with moving with the times. DUKE. Oh, come, come! Progress, you know, progress! Of course I know how busy you are; you mustn't overwork yourself, you know. Hastings was telling me you laughed over those subscriptions of mine. Well, well, I believe in looking at both sides of a question, you know. Aspects, as old Buffle called them. Aspects. [_With an all-embracing gesture of the arm._] You represent the tendency to drink in moderation, and you do good in _your_ way. The Doctor represents the tendency not to drink at all; and he does good in _his_ way. We can't be Ancient Britons, you know. [_A prolonged and puzzled silence, such as always follows the more abrupt of the_ DUKE'S _associations or disassociations of thought._ SMITH. [_At last, faintly._] Ancient Britons.... DOCTOR. [_To_ SMITH _in a low voice._] Don't bother. It's only his broad-mindedness. DUKE. [_With unabated cheerfulness._] I saw the place you're putting up for it, Mr. Smith. Very good work. Very good work, indeed. Art for the people, eh? I particularly liked that woodwork over the west door--I'm glad to see you're using the new sort of graining ... why, it all reminds one of the French Revolution.