tidiness, and this I can well believe, for she was certainly not
distinguished when I knew her for this virtue. She cared nothing for the
linen-closet, the spotless bed-hangings, and the bright poker, which were
the true household gods of the respectable women of those days. She
would have been instantly set down as “slut,” and as having “nasty dirty
forrin ways,” if a peculiar habit of hers had not unfortunately presented
itself, most irritating to her critics, so anxious promptly to gratify
their philosophic tendency towards scientific grouping. Mrs. Mobbs, who
lived next door to her, averred that she always slept with the window
open. Mrs. Mobbs, like everybody else, never opened her window except to
“air the room.” Mrs. Mobbs’ best bedroom was carpeted all over, and
contained a great four-post bedstead, hung round with heavy hangings, and
protected at the top from draughts by a kind of firmament of white
dimity. Mrs. Mobbs stuffed a sack of straw up the chimney of the
fireplace, to prevent the fall of the “sutt,” as she called it. Mrs.
Mobbs, if she had a visitor, gave her a hot supper, and expected her
immediately afterwards to go upstairs, draw the window curtains, get into
this bed, draw the bed curtains also, and wake up the next morning
“bilious.” This was the proper thing to do. Miss Leroy’s sitting-room
was decidedly disorderly; the chairs were dusty; “yer might write yer
name on the table,” Mrs. Mobbs declared; but, nevertheless, the casement
was never closed night nor day; and, moreover, Miss Leroy was believed by
the strongest circumstantial evidence to wash herself all over every
morning, a habit which Mrs. Mobbs thought “weakening,” and somehow
connected with ethical impropriety. When Miss Leroy was married, and
first as an elderly woman became known to me, she was very
inconsequential in her opinions, or at least appeared so to our eyes.
She must have been much more so when she was younger. In our town we
were all formed upon recognised patterns, and those who possessed any one
mark of the pattern, had all. The wine-merchant, for example, who went
to church, eminently respectable, Tory, by no means associating with the
tradesfolk who displayed their goods in the windows, knowing no
“experience,” and who had never felt the outpouring of the Spirit, was a
specimen of a class like him. Another class was represented by the
dissenting ironmonger, deacon, presiding at prayer-meetings, strict
Sabbatarian, and believer in eternal punishments; while a third was set
forth by “Guffy,” whose real name was unknown, who got drunk, unloaded
barges, assisted at the municipal elections, and was never once seen
inside a place of worship. These patterns had existed amongst us from
the dimmest antiquity, and were accepted as part of the eternal order of
things; so much so, that the deacon, although he professed to be sure
that nobody who had not been converted would escape the fire—and the
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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