May Fair : $b being an entertainment purporting to reveal to gentlefolk the real state of affairs existing in the very heart of London during the fifteenth and sixteenth years of the reign of His Majesty King George the Fifth: together with suitable reflections on the last follies, misadventures and galanteries of these charming peopleArlen, Michael
History
May Fair : $b being an entertainment purporting to reveal to gentlefolk the real state of affairs existing in the very heart of London during the fifteenth and sixteenth years of the reign of His Majesty King George the Fifth: together with suitable reflections on the last follies, misadventures and galanteries of these charming people
Arlen, Michael
Great Britain -- History -- George V, 1910-1936 -- Fiction; London (England) -- Fiction
“Enclosed Mr. Maturin will find a bank-note, which is in the nature of a
present to him from the correspondent: who, if he was not misinformed,
this night saw Mr. Maturin lose the last of his fortune at _chemin de
fer_. Should Mr. Maturin’s be a temperament that does not readily accept
gifts from strangers, which the correspondent takes the liberty to
doubt, he may give the bank-note to the bearer, who will no doubt be
delighted with it. The correspondent merely wishes Mr. Maturin to know
that the money, having once left his hands and come into contact with
Mr. Maturin’s, interests him no further. Nor are there any conditions
whatsoever attached to this gift. But should Mr. Maturin retain some
part of honour, which the correspondent takes the liberty to doubt, he
may return service for service. In so remote a contingency Mr. Maturin
will find a closed motor-car awaiting him near the flower-shop in
Clarges Street.”
Mr. Maturin thoughtfully tore the note into several parts and dropped
them to the pavement. The folded bank-note he, very thoughtful indeed,
put into an inner pocket.
“’Ere!” whined the small seedy man.
“Tell me,” said Mr. Maturin, “what manner of gentleman was the gent who
gave you this?”
“Bigger than you!” snarled the small seedy man. “Blast ’im for an old
capitalist, else my name isn’t ’Iggins!”
“I am sorry your name is Higgins if you don’t like it. But why,” asked
Mr. Maturin, “do you blast the gent who sent you after me?”
“I like that! Why hell! ’Ere he gives me two bob to go chasing after you
to give you a bank-note! Two bob! You couldn’t offer two bob for a
bloater in Wapping without getting arrested for using indecent language.
And you’re so blarsted superior, you are, that you ain’t even looked to
see ’ow much it is!”
“Why, I had forgotten!” smiled Mr. Maturin, and, producing the
bank-note, unfolded it. It was a Bank of England note for £1,000.
“It’s not true!” gasped the small seedy man. “Oh, Gawd, it can’t be
true! And in my ’and all that time and me chasing orl up Piccadilly with
it to _give_ away!”
“Well, good-night,” said Mr. Maturin. “And thank you.”
“’E thanks me!” gasped the small seedy man. “’Ere, and ain’t you even
going to give me a little bit of somethink extra so’s I’ll remember this
ewneek occasion?”
“I’m very afraid,” said Mr. Maturin, feeling carefully in all his
pockets, “that this note you have brought me is all I have. I am really
very sorry. By the way, don’t forget what I said about the salmon. And
be very careful of what you drink. For what, let’s face it, do they
know of dyspepsia, who only Kia-Ora know?”
“’Ere!” whined the small seedy man, but Mr. Maturin, crossing Piccadilly
where the glare of an arc-lamp stamped the mire with a thousand yellow
lights, was already lost in the shadow of the great walls of Devonshire
House. In Clarges Street, near the corner, he came upon a long, closed
car. The chauffeur, a boy, looked sleepily at him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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