Memoirs of Bertha von Suttner: The Records of an Eventful Life (Vol. 1 of 2) — John Shaqi
Memoirs of Bertha von Suttner: The Records of an Eventful Life (Vol. 1 of 2)Suttner, Bertha von
History
Memoirs of Bertha von Suttner: The Records of an Eventful Life (Vol. 1 of 2)
Suttner, Bertha von
Peace; Suttner, Bertha von, 1843-1914; Women -- Austria -- Biography
Taikowitz, the 19th July 1858.[3]
Here follows the elucidation of these enigmatical inscriptions:
One day I went into Elvira’s room, and, as was very often the case,
found her sitting at her writing-desk. I came up to her and saw her
hastily cover up the blank-book in which she had been writing.
“What did you hide the book for?”
“I?” and she was suffused with fiery red.
“Show it to me.”
“No, no—”
“Have you secrets from me? Do you call that friendship?”
“You would laugh at me, mock at me!”
“Mock at you, I? You think thus of _my_ friendship?”
“The book has love-songs in it.”
“Well, every poet writes those; there’s nothing to laugh at in that. On
the contrary, I always feel that you write too many ballads, nothing
that sounds personal. Read me one of those love-songs, do.”
She drew out the book:
“All right, you shall hear the first—there are ten of them in all.”
She read. They were glowing stanzas. I do not mean such as many of our
up-to-date young girls print, volcanic outbursts of eroticism; but,
within the range of the permissible, the respectably permissible, they
were enthusiastic outpourings of heartfelt devotion. I thought them
marvelous.
“You must send that to Grillparzer.”
“No, there must never a stranger see these poems—my love is my secret.”
“Your love? Why, surely that is only poetry; we don’t see anybody but
the old schoolmaster and the minister; your verses are addressed to an
ideal—”
“My ideal is alive; look here!”
She pushed the book over to me and pointed to the final poem. The next
to the last line ended with the word _adeln_ (unhappily I have forgotten
the rest of the line), and the last ran
_Weil ich dich liebe, Friedrich zu Hadeln._
(Because I love thee, Friedrich of Hadeln.)
“For dear heaven’s sake!” I exclaimed. It had given me a turn. There
before me was the miracle. A real living love for a real living object.
Elvira seemed to me transformed, and now the remembered figure of the
Nassau ensign too came before my soul bathed in magical light. Yes, he
was in truth handsome, and assuredly there was in his nature the power
to _adeln_, “ennoble,” those who had learned to understand and to love
him, the adorable Friedrich von Hadeln.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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