Men, Women, and God: A Discussion of Sex Questions from the Christian Point of ViewGray, A. Herbert (Arthur Herbert)
Religion
Men, Women, and God: A Discussion of Sex Questions from the Christian Point of View
Gray, A. Herbert (Arthur Herbert)
Sexual ethics -- Early 20th century
A great many men are secretly ashamed of the very fact that they have
to struggle with temptation in the matter of purity. In an inner
chamber of their lives they contend with impure thoughts and impure
suggestions, but they try to keep the doors of that chamber shut, and
would blush if others knew what goes on there. Yet all healthy and
normal men are so tempted. Those who seem to have escaped have
generally taken the course of repressing the whole sexual side of their
natures, and of shutting their eyes to the sexual facts of life, which
is not a wise course. And so, firstly, in view of the task of facing
temptation it would be well for us all to realize that temptation
itself is not sin. We may expose ourselves to quite unnecessary
temptation. We may play with fire. We may be fools, if we will. But
some element of temptation is part of our normal lot in life, and we
need not blush about it. To the average young man it can truly be said,
"There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man." In
this respect we are all brothers in arms, and I believe the first step
towards victory lies in an honest facing of the fact. Let us admit that
we are tempted and get openly to the business of understanding how
temptation can be conquered.
Let me attempt first of all to clear away certain mischievous delusions
about the subject. It is actually believed in many quarters, and half
believed in many more, that continence is bad for a man. It is only
"natural," men often say, for an adult man to satisfy his desires, and
if he does not he suffers in health. It is a point on which we must let
the doctors speak, even although plenty of individual men could testify
from experience that the idea is nonsense. And what do the doctors say!
Sir Dyce Ductworth, Sir James Paget, Sir Andrew Clark, Sir Clifford
Allbutt, and scores of others have all expressed themselves with the
clearest emphasis. Sir James Paget, for instance, says, "Chastity or
purity of life does no harm to mind or body. Its discipline is
excellent. Marriage can safely be waited for." Further, in the noble
little book on "Sex" by Thomson and Geddes, I find this sentence:
"Féré, a leading authority on sex pathology and hygiene, denies
categorically that a man is ever hurt by continence, and affirms that
he is always the stronger." What probably is true is that if a man
lives in thought an impure life, and submits himself to exciting
suggestions and imaginations, the secretions of his body will be
increased, so that he may become subject to very severe strain. And
that, if continued, may work nervous damage. But this only means that a
continent life requires thought and proper direction. There _need be_
no evil effects from continence. We must be quite clear about
this point, for so long as we toy in mind with the suggestion that
there is any natural necessity for incontinence, we are fatally
weakened for our struggle. It is a man's glory to be master of himself,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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