Humorous stories, American; United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Fiction; War stories, American
(_Refers to her book, and rattles through, several times, like one
memorizing_:) Entschuldigen Sie, mein Herr, können Sie mir vielleicht
sagen, um wie viel Uhr der erste Zug nach Dresden abgeht? (_Makes
mistakes and corrects them._) I just hate Meisterschaft! We may see
people; we can have society: yes, on condition that the conversation
shall be in German, and in German only—every single word of it! Very
kind—oh, very! when neither Annie nor I can put two words together,
except as they are put together for us in Meisterschaft or that idiotic
Ollendorff! (_Refers to book, and memorizes: Mein Bruder hat Ihren Herrn
Vater nicht gesehen, als er gestern in dem Laden des deutschen
Kaufmannes war._) Yes, we can have society, provided we talk German.
What would such a conversation be like! If you should stick to
Meisterschaft, it would change the subject every two minutes; and if you
stuck to Ollendorff, it would be all about your sister’s mother’s good
stocking of thread, or your grandfather’s aunt’s good hammer of the
carpenter, and who’s got it, and there an end. You couldn’t keep up your
interest in such topics. (_Memorizing: Wenn irgend möglich,—möchte ich
noch heute Vormittag dort ankommen, da es mir sehr daran gelegen ist,
einen meiner Geschäftsfreunde zu treffen._) My mind is made up to one
thing: I will be an exile, in spirit and in truth: I will see no one
during these three months. Father is very ingenious—oh, very! thinks he
is, anyway. Thinks he has invented a way to _force_ us to learn to speak
German. He is a dear good soul, and all that; but invention isn’t his
fash’. He will see. (_With eloquent energy._) Why, nothing in the world
shall—Bitte, können Sie mir vielleicht sagen, ob Herr Schmidt mit diesem
Zuge angekommen ist? Oh, dear, dear George—three weeks! It seems a whole
century since I saw him. I wonder if he suspects that I—that I—care for
him——j—just a wee, wee bit? I believe he does. And I believe Will
suspects that Annie cares for _him_ a little, that I do. And I know
perfectly well that they care for _us_. They agree with all our
opinions, no matter what they are; and if they have a prejudice, they
change it, as soon as they see how foolish it is. Dear George! at first
he just couldn’t abide cats; but now, why now he’s just all for cats; he
fairly welters in cats. I never saw such a reform. And it’s just so with
_all_ his principles: he hasn’t got one that he had before. Ah, if all
men were like him, this world would——(_Memorizing: Im Gegentheil, mein
Herr, dieser Stoff is sehr billig. Bitte, sehen Sie sich nur die
Qualität an._) Yes, and what did _they_ go to studying German for, if it
wasn’t an inspiration of the highest and purest sympathy? Any other
explanation is nonsense——why, they’d as soon have thought of studying
American history. (_Turns her back, buries herself in her pamphlet,
first memorizing aloud, until Annie enters, then to herself, rocking to
and fro, and rapidly moving her lips, without uttering a sound._)
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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