The sewing-class was started, and Miss Ellis became one of its most devoted teachers, though working often in great feebleness and pain. Feel bluer, but I believe my deafness is bringing me truer faith, and resignation.... Another very warm day, but I have managed to get through the day cheerfully, thinking of heavenly things.... I cannot understand what makes me so ugly sometimes. I pray that my evil spirit may be subdued some day.... Do not know of anything I have done to benefit others to-day, only I have been cheerful.... I have felt pretty well, and this day went rightly with me, though I do not know as I have advanced the cause of life very much.... How I do long to live a perfectly unselfish life, and to be a blessing to those around me, as my life was intended for!... Am reading "Old Kensington," by Miss Thackeray,--a real love-story; and it makes me sad, as usual.... Still in the house, and feel poorly. Feel a little dull this evening, and on thinking over my life, think that I have had more than most people of my age to endure, and wonder that I keep up my spirits as well as I have; and it is only that I feel that all is the necessary discipline for me. "Let us but be genuine, honest, and true in everything, even in the smallest thing, and we have in that the sign and the pledge of entire consecration of heart and life to God" (J. F. Clarke). "Be faithful unto death, and I will give you a crown of life" (Rev. ii. 10).... Gave up to a _terrible_ fit of the "blues" this afternoon and evening. Am _so_ tired of suffering all the time, that I gave way under my cross to-day. It seems as if I can't struggle to live longer. _Sunday._ A bright day; I was not able to go out, but felt that it was good to remain at home to think over my blessings.... Attended Bible-class this evening. I came home in rather a despondent mood. I find my cross hard to bear, but must pray for more strength. 1874. Sent my old Bible to be bound to-day, which I have used twenty-three years.... I have felt extremely favored to-day, in that I was able to attend the Sewing School, which I feared all the week I might be disappointed in. We closed the school to-day, after twenty-four weeks' work. It has been time well spent, and I feel particularly thankful to my heavenly Father in having heard my prayer for health, strength, and good weather. One strong desire of my life has been vouchsafed me, and I feel overpowered with joy to-night.... I have felt to-day how much I need the assistance of Christ, and may his religion help me to be victorious in the end.