Miss Ravenel's conversion from secession to loyaltyDe Forest, John William
History
Miss Ravenel's conversion from secession to loyalty
De Forest, John William
Historical fiction; United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Fiction; War stories; Women -- United States -- Fiction
One September afternoon she sent for Edward. The Doctor had gone; his
labors were over. The clergyman had gone; neither was he longer needed.
There was no one in the room but the nurse, the dying mother and the
only child. The change had been expected for days, and Edward had
thought that he was prepared for it; had indeed marvelled and been
shocked at himself because he could look forward to it with such seeming
composure; for, reason with his heart and his conscience as he might, he
could not feel a fitting dread and anguish. In the common phrase of
humanity, when numbed by unusual sorrow, he could not realize it. But
now, as, leaning over the footboard and looking steadfastly upon his
mother's face, he saw that the final hour had come, a sickness of heart
fell upon him, and a trembling as if his soul were being torn asunder.
Yet neither wept; the Puritans and the children of the Puritans do not
weep easily; they are taught, not to utter, but to hide their emotions.
The nurse perceived no signs of unusual feeling, except that the face of
the strong man became suddenly as pale as that of the dying woman, and
that to him this was an hour of anguish, while to her it was one of
unspeakable joy. The mother knew her son too well not to see, even with
those failing eyes, into the depths of his sorrow.
"Don't be grieved for me, Edward," she said. "I am sustained by the
faith of the promises. I am about to return from the place whence I
came. I am re-entering with peace and with confidence into a blessed
eternity."
He came to the side of the bed, sat down on it and took her hand without
speaking.
"You will follow me some day," she went on. "You will follow me to the
place where I shall be, at the right hand of the Lord. I have prayed for
it often;--I was praying for it a moment ago; and, my child, my prayer
will be granted. Oh, I have been so fearful for you; but I am fearful no
longer."
He made no answer except to press her hand while she paused to draw a
few short and wearisome breaths.
"I can bear to part with you now," she resumed. "I could not bear it
till the Lord granted me this full assurance that we shall meet again. I
leave you in his hands. I make no conditions with him. I have been
sweetly brought to give you altogether up to one who loves you better
than I know how to love you. He gave me my love, and he has kept more
than he gave. Perhaps I have been selfish, Edward, to hold on to you as
I have. You have felt it your duty to go into the army, and perhaps I
have been selfish to prevent you. Now you are free; to-morrow I shall
not be here. If you still see that to be your duty, go; and the Lord go
with you, darling, and give you strength and courage. I do not ask him
to spare you, but only to guide you here below, and restore you to me
above.----And he will do it, Edward, for his own sake. I am full of
confidence; the promises are sure. For you and for myself, I rejoice
with a joy unspeakable and full of glory."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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