Mr. Pim Passes By: A Comedy in Three ActsMilne, A. A. (Alan Alexander)
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Mr. Pim Passes By: A Comedy in Three Acts
Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander)
English drama -- 20th century
(OLIVIA _comes to table_ L.C., _closes her workbox and then crosses down
to settee_ R.)
GEORGE (_rising and crossing down to_ OLIVIA _and placing arms lovingly
on her shoulder_). Now look here, Olivia, old girl, you've been a jolly
good wife to me--(_takes his arms from her shoulder_)--and we don't often
have rows, and if I've been rude to you about this--lost my temper a bit
perhaps, what?--I'll say I'm sorry. May I have a kiss?
OLIVIA (_holding up her face_). George, darling! (_He kisses her_.) Do
you love me?
GEORGE. You know I do, old girl.
OLIVIA. As much as Brian loves Dinah?
GEORGE (_stiffly, taking her hands from his shoulders_). I've said all I
want to say about that. (_He goes away from her to_ L.)
OLIVIA. Oh, but there must be lots you want to say and perhaps don't like
to. (_Sits on settee_ R.) Do tell me, darling.
GEORGE (_coming back to_ C.). What it comes to is this. I consider that
Dinah is too young to choose a husband for herself, and that Strange
isn't the husband I should choose for her.
OLIVIA. You were calling him Brian yesterday.
GEORGE. Yesterday I regarded him as a boy, now he wants me to look upon
him as a man.
OLIVIA. He's twenty-four.
GEORGE. Yes, and Dinah's nineteen. Ridiculous. (_Crossing up to
smoking-table up_ R., _and filling his pipe which he finds on table_.)
OLIVIA. If he'd been a Conservative, and thought that clouds were round,
I suppose he'd have seemed older, somehow.
GEORGE. That's a different point altogether. That has nothing to do with
his age.
OLIVIA (_innocently_). Oh, I thought it had.
GEORGE (_crossing down_ C. _stuffing tobacco into his pipe_). What I am
objecting to is these ridiculously early marriages before either party
knows its own mind, much less the mind of the other party. (_Moving to
fireplace looking for a match_.) Such marriages invariably lead to
unhappiness.
OLIVIA. Of course, _my_ first marriage wasn't a happy one.
GEORGE. As you know, Olivia, I dislike speaking about your first marriage
at all--(_takes a match from table down_ L. OLIVIA _rises slowly and
goes up to_ R. _of writing-table_)--and I had no intention of bringing it
up now, but since you mention it--well, there's a case in point. (_Sits
on settee_ L., _lighting his pipe_.)
OLIVIA (_looking back at it_). When I was eighteen, I was in love.
GEORGE (_turning to her_). What?
OLIVIA. Or perhaps I only thought I was, and I don't know if I should
have been happy or not if I had married him. But my father made me marry
Mr. Jacob Telworthy. (GEORGE _looks up at her, annoyed_.) And when things
were too hot for him in England--"too hot for him"--I think that was the
expression we used in those days--then we went to Australia, and I left
him there. (_Goes slowly down to back of settee_ L.) And the only happy
moment I had in all my married life was on the morning when I saw in the
papers that he was dead. (_Leans with her arms over back of settee_.)
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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