Mr. Pim Passes By: A Comedy in Three ActsMilne, A. A. (Alan Alexander)
General
Mr. Pim Passes By: A Comedy in Three Acts
Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander)
English drama -- 20th century
BRIAN (R. _of writing-table_). Come on, then, Dinah.
DINAH (_following him_). Right-o. (_They exeunt through windows and off
to_ L.)
GEORGE (_as they go_). And if you do see any clouds, Strange, take a good
look at them. (_He chuckles to himself_.) Triangular clouds--I never
heard of such nonsense. (_He goes back to his chair at the writing-table
and sits_.) Futuristic rubbish... Well, Olivia?
OLIVIA (_sewing curtains_). Well, George?
GEORGE. What are you doing?
OLIVIA. Making curtains--(_grunt of disapproval from_ GEORGE)--George.
Won't they be rather sweet? Oh, but I forgot--you don't like them.
GEORGE. No. I don't like them, and what is more, I don't mean to have
them in my house. As I told you yesterday, this is the house of a simple
country gentleman, and I don't want any of these new-fangled ideas in it.
OLIVIA. Is marrying for love a new-fangled idea?
GEORGE. We'll come to that directly. None of you women can keep to the
point. What I am saying now is that the house of my fathers and
forefathers is good enough for me.
OLIVIA. Do you know, George, I can hear one of your ancestors saying that
to his wife in their smelly old cave--(GEORGE _looks up annoyed at her
levity_)--when the new-fangled idea of building houses was first
suggested. "The Cave of my Forefathers is good enough for----"
GEORGE (_rising and coming to_ R. _of_ L.C. _table_). That's ridiculous.
Naturally we must have progress. But that's just the point. (_Indicating
the curtains_.) I don't call this sort of thing progress. It's--ah--
retrogression.
OLIVIA. Well, anyhow, it's pretty.
GEORGE. There I disagree with you. And I must say once more that I will
not have them hanging in my house. (_Going up_ R.C.)
OLIVIA. Very well, George. (_But she goes on working_.)
GEORGE (_seeing her continuing to sew, stops_). That being so, I don't
see the necessity of going on with them.
OLIVIA. Well, I must do something with them now I've got the material.
(GEORGE _goes up to writing-table, sits and writes_.)
I thought perhaps I could sell them when they're finished--as we're so
poor.
GEORGE (_turns to her with surprised look_). What do you mean--so poor?
OLIVIA. Well, you said just now that you couldn't give Dinah an allowance
because rents had gone down.
GEORGE (_annoyed_). Confound it, Olivia! Keep to the point! We'll talk
about Dinah's affairs directly. We're discussing our own affairs at the
moment.
OLIVIA. But what is there to discuss, dear?
GEORGE. Well, those ridiculous things.
OLIVIA. But we've finished that. You've said you wouldn't have them
hanging in your house, and I've said, "Very well, George."--(GEORGE _is
again annoyed_.)--Now we can go on to Dinah, and Brian.
GEORGE (_shouting_). But put these beastly things away.
OLIVIA (_rising and gathering up the curtains_). Very well, George.
(_Going up_ L. _she places the curtains on the cabinet_.)
GEORGE (_waits impatiently until she has put them away on top of
cabinet_). Ah! That's better.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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