_Mrs. Robinson_ (_Materfamilias_). Scarcely room to swing a cot, for baby. Thank goodness, all the children are on the beach. I hope Mary Ann won't let out to the other nurses that Totty had the scarlet fever. He's quite well now, poor little man, and no one will be any the worse for it. Horrid! of course. No, it is not a Colorado beetle, Robinson. They infest the curtains; we did not bring them with us in our trunks. Do go out and buy some insect-powder, instead of looking stupid behind that nasty cigar. Oh, and get some soap and some tooth-powder, and order baby's tonic, and Jane's iron--mind, sesqui-sulphate of iron (I suppose I must find the prescription), and a box of--what's that stuff for sore throats? And do hire a perambulator with a hood. And we have no dessert for to-morrow--you know, or you ought to know, it's Sunday. Some fruit, and what you like. Oh! and don't forget some biscuits for the dog. What has become of Tiny? Tiny! Tiny! I know he did not go with the children. I dare say he has eaten something horrid, and is dying under a chair. Dear! dear! who would be mother of a family with such a careless, thoughtless, quite too utterly selfish husband as you are. Of course you never remembered to-day was my birthday. I ought never to have been born. A bracelet or a pair of ear-rings--or, by the way, I saw a lovely châtelaine on the Parade. You might find enough to give me one pleasure since our wedding. _Robinson_ (_Paterfamilias_). I like the seaside, I do. When will it be over? * * * * * [Illustration: A SANDY COVE] * * * * * [Illustration: A FRAGMENT Augustus knows a certain snug retreat-- A little rocky cavern by the sea-- Where, sheltered from the rain (and every eye), He fondly hopes to breathe his tale of love Into his artless Arabella's ear!...] * * * * * [Illustration: LONGING FOR A NEW SENSATION _Jack_ (_a naughty boy, who is always in disgrace, and most deservedly_). "I say, Effie, do you know what I should like? I should like to be accused of something I'd never done!"] * * * * * [Illustration: A LAMENT _Dowager._ "It's been the worst season I can remember, Sir James! All the men seem to have got married, and none of the girls!"] * * * * * [Illustration: JOYS OF THE SEASIDE _Brown._ "What beastly weather! And the glass is going steadily down!" _Local Tradesman._ "Oh, that's nothing, sir. The glass has no effect whatever on _our_ part of the coast!"] * * * * * THE BETTER THE DAY, THE BETTER THE TALK! [Illustration: BROAD-STARES] SCENE--_Any fashionable Watering-place where "Church Parade" is a recognised institution._ TIME--_Sunday_, 1 P.M. _Enter_ Brown _and_ Mrs. Brown, _who take chairs_. _Mrs. Brown._ Good gracious! Look another way! Those odious people, the Stiggingses, are coming towards us!