I saw some on 'em this mornin bringin in sum fish, and asked the price of a pair of Souls, but they axshally said they didn't dare sell one, for every man Jack of 'em must be sent to Billingsgate! but werry likely sum on 'em might be sent back again in the arternoon, and then I could get some at the Fishmonger's! What a nice derangemunt! There was the butiful fresh fish reddy for eating, there was me and my family reddy to eat 'em, but no, they must be packed in boxes and carried to the Station and then sent by Rale to London, and then sent by Wan to Billingsgate, and that takes I'm told ever so many hours, and then carried back to the London Stashun, and then sent by Rale to Northgate, and then carried from the Stashun to the Fishmonger's, and then I'm allowed to buy 'em! Well if that isn't a butiful business like arrangement, my Lord Mare, I should like to know what is. However, as I wunce herd a Deputy say, when things cums to their wust, things is sure to mend, and I don't think that things can be much wusser than that. (_Signed_) ROBERT. * * * * * [Illustration: LIGHT PUFFS RAISED A LITTLE SWELL] * * * * * [Illustration: HEAVY SWELL ON THE BAR] * * * * * [Illustration: THE BELL BUOY] * * * * * THE SPIRIT OF THE THING.--_Landlady_ (_to shivering lodger_). No, sir, I don't object to your dining at a restorong, nor to your taking an 'apenny paper, but I must resent your constant 'abit of locking up your whiskey, thereby himplying that me, a clergyman's daughter, is prone to larceny. [_Lodger immediately hands her the key as a guarantee of good faith._ * * * * * [Illustration: THE BORES OF THE BEACH So! as it's a fine day, you'll sit on the beach and read the paper comfortably, will you? Very good! Then we recommend you to get what guinea-pigs, brandy-balls, boats, and children's socks, to say nothing of shell-workboxes, lace collars, and the like you may want, before you settle down.] * * * * * [Illustration: "Excuse me, sir. I seem to have met you before. Are you not a relative of Mr. Dan Briggs?" "No, madam. I _am_ Mr. Dan Briggs himself." "Ah, then that explains the remarkable resemblance!"] * * * * * [Illustration: ACCOMMODATING _Lodger._ "And then, there's that cold pheasant, Mrs. Bilkes"---- _Landlady._ "Yes'm, and if you should have enough without it, lor', Mr. Bilkes wouldn't mind a eatin' of it for his supper, if that's all."] * * * * * [Illustration: _Mrs. Brown._ "Might I ask how much you gave that nigger?" _Mr. Brown_ (_first day down_). "Sixpence." _Mrs. B._ "Oh, indeed! Perhaps, sir, you are not aware that your wife and family have listened to those same niggers for the last ten days for a _penny_!"] * * * * *