The common cat of the metropolis (_Felis Catterwaulans_) is remarkable, especially for the exceeding frequency and shrillness of its cries when it goes upon the tiles, or proceeds to other spots of feline popular resort. Sleep becomes impossible within earshot of its yellings, and the injury they cause to property as well as human temper is immense. It has, indeed, been roughly estimated that thirty thousand water-jugs are annually sacrificed, within a circuit of not more than six miles from St. Paul's, by being hurled from bedroom windows with the aim to stop these squalling feline "Voices of the night." A certain proof that oysters are amphibious may be noted in the fact that they always build their grottoes in the courts and the back streets of the metropolis where, in the month of August, with extravagant profusion, their shells are yearly cast. The scarlet-coated lobster (_Le Homard Militaire_, Cuvier) has been frequently discovered on the shores of the Serpentine, or basking by the margin of the water in St. James's Park. This crustacean, when treated well, will drink like a fish, excepting that, unlike a fish, he does not confine himself to water for his drink. His shell (jacket) is of a bright red colour, which is not produced, as in the lobster species generally, by the agency of the caloric in the act of being boiled. The scarlet-coated lobster leads, while in London, a very peaceful life, notwithstanding his presumed propensities for fighting. If we may credit the statistics which, with no slight labour, have been recently collected, no fewer than five million and eleven blue-bottles are annually slaughtered in the butchers' shops of London, before depositing their ova in the primest joints of meat. The number of the smaller flies which, merely in the City, are every year destroyed for buzzing round the bald heads of irritable bank clerks, amounts, it has been calculated, to one million three hundred thousand and thirteen. * * * * * FROM TAPLOW.--_First 'Arry._ I'll tell you a good name for a riverside inn--_"The Av-a-launch"._ _Second 'Arry._ I'll tell you a better--"The 'Ave-a-lunch." Come along! * * * * * [Illustration: "Did yer order any ile round the corner?" "What do you mean by ile? Do you mean oil?" "Naw. Not ile, but ILE wot yer drinks!"] * * * * * [Illustration: A QUESTION OF THE SENSES. _First County Councillor._ "I'm told the _acoustics_ of this hall leave much to be desired, Mr. Brown!" _Second C. C. (delicately sniffing)._ "Indeed, Sir Pompey? Can't say as I perceive anythink amiss, myself; and my nose is pretty sharp, too!"] * * * * * [Illustration: QUICK WORK. _Guttersnipe._ "Please muvver wants sixpence on this 'ere fryin' pan." _Pawnbroker._ "Hallo! it's _hot_!" _Guttersnipe._ "Yus, muvver's just cooked the sossidges, an' wants the money for the beer!"]