So keep, deah boys! On the Cheap, (_Gallantly._) And we’ll chance what may happen on the deep! For we can’t be the losers if we save the cost o’ cruisers, And contentedly continue--On the Cheap! _Third Verse._ The British Isles are not the Conti-nong, deah boys! (_Scornfully._) Where the Johnnies on defences spend a heap. No! we’re Britons, and we’re game to jog along, deah boys! (_With pathos._) In the old time-honoured fashion--On the Cheap! _Chorus._ (_Imploringly._) Ah! keep, deah boys! On the Cheap; For the price we’re asked to pay is pretty steep. Let us all unite to dock it, keep the money in our pocket, And we’ll conquer or we’ll perish--On the Cheap! _Fourth Verse._ If the Tories have the cheek to touch our purse, deah boys! Their reward at the elections let ’em reap! They will find a big Conservative reverse, deah boys! If they can’t defend the country--On the Cheap! _Chorus._ They must keep, deah boys! On the Cheap, Or the lot out of office we will sweep! Bull gets rusty when you tax him, and his patriotic maxim Is, “I’ll trouble you to govern--On the Cheap!” _Fifth Verse_ (_this to be sung shrewdly_). If the Gover’ment ain’t mugs they’ll take the tip, deah boys! Just to look a bit ahead before they leap, And instead of laying down an extry ship, deah boys! They’ll cut down the whole caboodle--On the Cheap! _Chorus_ (_with spirit and fervour_). And keep, deah boys! On the Cheap! For we ain’t like a bloomin’ lot o’ sheep. When we want to “parry bellum,”[A] [_Union Jack to be waved here._ You may bet yer boots we’ll tell ’em! But we’ll have the “bellum” “parried”--On the Cheap! This song, if sung with any spirit, should, _Mr. Punch_ thinks, cause a positive _furore_ in any truly patriotic gathering, and possibly go some way towards influencing the decision of the country, and consequently the fate of the Empire, in the next General Elections. In the meantime it is at the service of any Champion Music Hall Comique who is capable of appreciating it. FOOTNOTE: [A] Music-hall Latinity--“_Para bellum_.” II.--THE TOPICAL-POLITICAL. [Illustration: “--And the Post!”]