Mr Punch's Pocket Ibsen - A Collection of Some of the Master's Best Known DramasAnstey, F.
General
Mr Punch's Pocket Ibsen - A Collection of Some of the Master's Best Known Dramas
Anstey, F.
Ibsen, Henrik, 1828-1906 -- Parodies, imitations, etc.
Just like your poor father, _he_ always asked me to make it cash--he
never made any himself! It's heredity, I suppose. Well--well!
[_Goes back to his Bank._ NORA _goes on humming._
_Enter_ MRS. LINDEN, _doubtfully._
NORA.
What, Christina--why, how old you look! But then you are poor. I'm not.
Torvald has just been made a Bank Manager. [_Tidies the room._] Isn't it
really wonderfully delicious to be well off? But of course, you wouldn't
know. _We_ were poor once, and, do you know, when Torvald was ill,
I--[_tossing her head_]--though I _am_ such a frivolous little squirrel,
and all that, I actually borrowed £300 for him to go abroad. Wasn't
_that_ clever? Tra-la-la! I shan't tell you _who_ lent it. I didn't even
tell Torvald. I am such a mere baby I don't tell him everything. I tell
Dr. Rank, though. Oh, I'm so awfully happy I should like to shout, "Dash
it all!"
MRS. LINDEN.
[_Stroking her hair._] Do--it is a natural and innocent outburst--you
are such a child! But I am a widow, and want employment. _Do_ you think
your husband could find me a place as clerk in his Bank? [_Proudly._] I
am an excellent knitter!
NORA.
That would really be awfully funny. [_To_ HELMER, _who enters._]
Torvald, this is Christina; she wants to be a clerk in your Bank--_do_
let her! She thinks such a lot of _you_. [_To herself._] Another
taradiddle!
HELMER.
She is a sensible woman, and deserves encouragement. Come along, Mrs.
Linden, and we'll see what we can do for you.
[_He goes out through the hall with_ MRS. LINDEN, _and the front-door
is heard to slam after them._
NORA.
[_Opens door, and calls._] Now, Emmy, Ivar, and Bob, come in and have a
romp with Mamma--we will play hide-and-seek. [_She gets under the
table, smiling in quiet satisfaction_; KROGSTAD _enters_--NORA _pounces
out upon him._] Boo!... Oh, I beg your pardon. I don't do this kind of
thing _generally_--though I may be a little silly.
[Illustration: "Boo!"]
KROGSTAD.
[_Politely._] Don't mention it. I called because I happened to see your
husband go out with Mrs. Linden--from which, being a person of
considerable penetration, I infer that he is about to give her my post
at the Bank. Now, as you owe me the balance of £300, for which I hold
your acknowledgment, you will see the propriety of putting a stop to
this little game at once.
NORA.
But I don't at all--not a little wee bit! I'm so childish, you know--why
_should_ I?
[_Sitting upright on carpet._
KROGSTAD.
I will try to make it plain to the meanest capacity. When you came to me
for the loan, I naturally required some additional security. Your
father, being a shady Government official, without a penny--for, if he
had possessed one, he would presumably have left it to you--without a
penny, then--I, as a cautious man of business, insisted upon having his
signature as a surety. Oh, we Norwegians are sharp fellows!
NORA.
Well, you _got_ papa's signature, didn't you?
KROGSTAD.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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