[Illustration: _Traveller (to Colonial Squatter)._ “Hullo, McDonald! I didn’t expect this of you! All your men working on a Sunday!” _Mac._ “This is nae Sunday, mun!--it’s Wednesday----” _Traveller._ “Not a bit of it! This is Sunday, I assure you----” _Mac._ “Aweel! Think o’ that, noo! We hinna seen a sowl for three months, an’ there’s nae an almanack i’ the hoose, an’ we’ve gotten jummelt up a’ th’gether!!”] [Illustration: _Malcolm (to the Colonel, who had been narrating his fishing adventures all over the globe)._ “Ye must ha’e had gran’ sport among the black men, sir! Hed they ony releegion?”--_Colonel._ “All kinds, Malcolm. Some worshipped idols, some the sun, some the moon, some the water----” _Malcolm._ “The watter!” (_Musing._) “Aweel, sir, I couldna’ bring mysel’ to care for that!”] [Illustration: _Keeper (to the two Tourists, who find canoeing more difficult on the Highland rivers than on the Thames)._ “Hi! Hoy! Hoy! D’ye no ken this is the McChizzlem’s private watter!?”] [Illustration: MAGNIFYING HIS CALLING _Peter._ “Na, laddie, this is ane o’ thae things a body can never learn. There’s no nae use in a man takin’ tae _this_ job unless he has a naiteral born aptitude for’d!”] [Illustration: GOING TO EXTREMES _He of the ruffled temper._ “As sure’s ma name’s Tammas Paterson, I’ll hae the law o’ ye, though it should cost me hauf-a-croon!”] [Illustration: CARBINE PRACTICE Sandy McGuttle and a friend of his marking in butt. Officer in charge of squad at the shooting-range wonders why the deuce they don’t signal that last shot. He has also grave doubts about the number of bulls’-eyes already recorded.] [Illustration: STAUNCH _Old Lady (who had been buying eggs)._ “’Deed, Mr. McTreacle, butchers’ meat’s sae dear now-a-days ah’m no able to buy’t!” _Grocer._ “You should turn a vegetarian----” _Old Lady._ “A veegetarian!--Na, na! ah was born an’ brocht up i’ the Free Kirk, an’ a’m no gaun ta change ma releegion i’ m’ auld days!”] [Illustration: _Officer of Militia._ “Well, sir, who are you? and what’s the matter?” _Excited Citizen._ “Me? I’m the bailie--the heid bailie, mon! I catched this wee laddie feshin’ on the Sawbath day! Says he’s a Caath’lic--a Rooman Caath’lic!! E-h, it’s just dreadfu’ to think o’--feshin’ in a Protestant loch!! And o’ the Sawbath! Lord save us!”] [Illustration: RESIGNATION _He (Third-Class)._ “Come awa’! D’ye no see that’s a first-class?” _She (ditto)._ “Aweel, on a busy day like this, we maun just put up wi’ _ony accommodation we can get!_!”] [Illustration: DESECRATION. _English Angler (on Saturday evening)._ “Anybody ever fish up here on a Sunday, m’um?” _Scots Landlady (in consternation)._ “Hech, mon! ye’d be jail’t!!”] [Illustration: “PREHISTORIC SCOTLAND” DE-PICT-ED (_NOT by Dr. Robert Munro._)] [Illustration: THE END] BRADBURY, AGNEW. & CO. LD., PRINTERS, LONDON AND TONBRIDGE * * * * * Transcriber’s Notes: Italic text is denoted by _underscores_.