But when I reach the river's side Alone, for none of these I wish, No victim to a foolish pride, My object is to capture fish; Let me confess, then, since you ask it-- A worm it is which fills my basket! O brown, unlovely, wriggling worm, On which with scorn the haughty look, It is thy fascinating squirm Which brings the fattest trout to book, From thee unable to refrain, Though flies are cast for him in vain! Deep gratitude to thee I feel, And then, perhaps, it's chiefly keen, When rival anglers view my creel, And straightway turn a jealous green; And, should they ask me--"What's your fly?" "A fancy pattern," I reply! * * * * * [Illustration: Catching crabs and flounders in the Thames] * * * * * [Illustration: Catching wails at Whippingham] * * * * * [Illustration: Catching soles and skate on the (sea) Serpentine] * * * * * [Illustration: Catching whiting from the Strand] * * * * * [Illustration: SOMETHING LIKE A CATCH.--_Mrs. Binks_ (_sick of it_). "Really, John! How can you bear to spend your time whip--whip--whipping at the stream all day long and never a single fish taking the least notice of you?" _John._ "Ah, but think o' the delight, Maria, when you do get a fish! Lor' bless us, my dear, have you forgotten the day when you hooked me?"] * * * * * [Illustration: FROM DEE-SIDE.--_Piscator._ "Yes, my boy, ain't he a beauty? Forty pounds--three foot eight from tail to snout--fresh run! I'm going to have him photographed, with a full-grown man standing by, to show the proportions. By the way"--(_faintly_)--"would--er--would _you_ mind being the _man_?"] * * * * * [Illustration: _Imperturbable Boatman._ "Haud up yer rod, man! Ye have 'm! ye have 'm!"] * * * * * ANECDOTE BY IZAAK WALTON.--One Piscator, whom I will not further name, had a certain acquaintance who, through the credit he had gotten by his wealth, worth, and wit, came to be made a magistrate. Whereupon Piscator goes me to the river and catches a fish, which having brought home, he sends to the new-made justice with a note, saying, "Inasmuch, sir, as you are now promoted to the condition of a beak, I do send you a perch." * * * * * [Illustration: ANGLING EXTRAORDINARY _Customer_ (_in a great hurry_). "A small box of gentles, please. And look sharp! I want to catch a 'bus!!"] * * * * * A SPORTIVE SONG _A Sojourner in North Britain goes Salmon-fishing with a New Young Woman._