“This milk are best science for all baby,” she report. “You put him in clean kettle & boil him to scalding point--” “Boil Baby to scalding point?” I screech with shocks. “No!! Boil milk,” she otter. Which show what difficult housekeeping babies can be. * * * Mr Editor, one important rule I notice about babies--you must not never give them nothing that they want. This Hon. Bushel Baby are continuously poking forth sweet hands and making considerable blueness from his eyes to show his undesirable whims & requisitions. One time I was approaching steps with 100-lb ice-chunk for kitchen. Hon. Baby seen this and order some by making finger-signals. How could I disobey this toy boss? So I split off slight fracture of ice & was attempting to make present of this to him when--O scream! Mrs Boss came flewing outward and seen what was. “Stop!” she holla. “You wish refrigerate that darling interior?” I feel entirely hashed for my ignorance. Another occasion Hon. Baby reach forth and begin eating loose end of my pink calicoed apron with toothless expression of sublime joyness. While he ate he say, “Ah-Goo!” which are Chinese words meaning “a good salad can be made of almost anything.” Screams!!! “What style murder are you serving to my child now?” yall Mrs Henery M. Bushel hysterially. “Excuse please. Are aprons injurious for food supply?” I ask to know. For answer Hon. Mrs Bushel grabb him to arms & rosh at telephone. “Hello, Doctor yes, come to the poisoning quick!” she gollup. Then she walk forward & back adding groans while Hon. Baby observe her emotions with great amusement. Honk-honk to door. Hon. Dr Ottomobile arrive with chuggs & he hop forthly containing bags and implements. “Where is poison?” he require, calm but nervus while his beard look entirely scientific. “Here are!” hissy Hon. Mrs tearing forth my apron. “Hon. Baby ate this heartily.” Hon. Dr took out mikeroscope. First he look at Hon. Baby through his mouth, then he poke that glass against my apron and peep with earnestness. “This article contain 101 per cent. venomous products,” he explan. “In addition there is maniac acid solution with hypocritical sublimate. I am surprised to see your child looking so well, because by Science he should be dead 9 times.” Hon. Mrs wept, but Hon. Baby continue making gurgle-laugh with Xmas dinner expression. For 48 complete hours his parents continued standing on end, expecting that child to perish off, because he was so much better behaved than usual. * * * Me & Alexander continue to be dear college chums; yet I was entirely nervus to approach him, because I was afraid I might explode some science connected with it. But all commencements have their finish. One day it came thusly: