So she led me to setting-room, walking with quiet toes and wrapped expression peculiar to folks approaching Mikado or some other President. In 1/8 size rocking-bed I observe Hon. Baby laying among considerable softness and appearing quite babyhood. “Are he not remarkabilious child?” she require. “I are sure he must be very distinguished,” I say sweetishly. “Why you think so?” she require with gently smiling. “Because,” I says so, “all distinguished persons appears quite plain when first observed.” “I do not care to hear your foreign thoughts,” she grudge. Hon. Baby make happy guggle to see me, so I know we should get very friendship together. I waggle my thumbs to him, so he make more laugh. “DON’T!!” holla Hon. Mrs. “You wish explode my child’s nerves by this actions?” “Are it injurious for childhood to laugh at my thumbs?” I ask it. “Many children are spoilt forever by too much laughter in infancy,” she explan. “I raise this child like I raise biscuits--by book. Volume entitled ‘How Do It to Grow Best Children’ tell me delicious nervus diseases what children will be entitled to if not careful. By feeding, exercise, etc., I intend to make this Babe great man for future.” “Shall he be Presidential Candidate, perhapsly?” I require. “No! he shall never have such brutal treatment!” she exclam. “Yet I are sure he shall be great because he has his grandfather’s eyes.” I could not believe such youngly child could rob old gentleman of his eyesight. Yet I say nothing. “Have he got a name?” I require for chivalry. “Several,” she report. “He are pronounced Alexander Applegate Leopold Bushel.” “Bushel baskets have been filled with less,” I say punnishly. “That name surrounds him completely.” “For shortness we call him Goo,” she say so. “Now I shall tell you his daily programme.” She take paper from table and read me following list of deeds intended for that Babyhood: 5:30 to 6 A. M. crying exercises enjoyed for development of lung. 6:15 sterilised milk programme with bottle. 7:30 Hon. Baby bathed in fluid offensive to mikrobes. Hon. Father then permitted to bring out scales and weigh Hon. Baby so to show he soon will be a Physical Perfection like Family. 8:10 A. M. ½ hour baby-talk conversation by his mother for development of brain. 8:40 slight perambulation in baby-cab continuing 2 hours. This trip must go through considerable streets and scenery, so Hon. Baby will get used to travel. 10:40 homeward arrival. More crying exercises enjoyed for benefit of lung. 11:30 continual sleep programme until entirely saturated with slumber. Afternoon--same like morning programme, only more so. Hon. Mrs Bushel told me this with intense accuracy peculiar to statistics. “You speak reverently about sterilised milk,” I pronounce. “How do you make this youthful beveridge?”