Mrs. Dot: A FarceMaugham, W. Somerset (William Somerset)
General
Mrs. Dot: A Farce
Maugham, W. Somerset (William Somerset)
English drama -- 20th century; Triangles (Interpersonal relations) -- Drama; Widows -- Drama
[_He takes the cheque and gloats over it._ MRS. DOT _quickly takes
a special licence out of the drawer and puts it on the table_.
MRS. DOT.
Now I’m going for a turn in the garden.
FREDDIE.
You are a brick.
[_She goes out. As soon as he sees the coast is clear, he gives a
peculiar whistle._ NELLIE _comes in_.
NELLIE.
I thought your whistle was never coming. They wanted me to go on the
river. I had to invent all sorts of excuses.
FREDDIE.
I don’t know how it is, but somehow we never manage to get a minute by
ourselves.
NELLIE.
It’s perfectly maddening. What a good idea it was of yours to meet in
the garden after they’d all gone to bed.
FREDDIE.
Was it my idea? I always thought it was yours!
NELLIE.
[_With wounded dignity._] It’s not likely I should have proposed a thing
like that.
FREDDIE.
No, it isn’t likely.
NELLIE.
I’m perfectly distracted. If you only knew how that man bores me!
FREDDIE.
I can’t think what you ever saw in him.
NELLIE.
I was never really fond of him, you know. I only accepted him because
he was so desperately in love with me, and mamma wouldn’t hear of it.
FREDDIE.
When did you first know that you cared for me?
NELLIE.
Oh, I don’t know. I think as soon as ever I found out you were in love
with me.
FREDDIE.
[_Rather taken aback._] Oh!
NELLIE.
When did you begin to love me?
FREDDIE.
Well, you know, I was awfully flattered by your caring for me.
NELLIE.
Oh!... [_There is a pause._] I don’t think I quite understand.
FREDDIE.
[_Opening his arms._] Darling!
NELLIE.
[_Cuddling in them._] Oh, it makes me feel so delightfully wicked. I
know I oughtn’t to let you kiss me. I know it’s treachery to poor
Gerald.
FREDDIE.
He isn’t worthy of you.
NELLIE.
He simply worships the ground I tread on. I am a perfect beast.
FREDDIE.
We’re treating him shamefully.
NELLIE.
I shall never forgive myself.
FREDDIE.
Poor Gerald.... He is an ass, isn’t he?
NELLIE.
Oh, awful.
[_They both go into shrieks of laughter._
NELLIE.
Take care!
[MRS. DOT _comes in with flowers in her hands_.
MRS. DOT.
Did I leave my scissors here? Just see if you can find them, Freddie.
Perhaps they’re in the next room. [_He goes out._] I wonder if I left
them on the writing-table.
[NELLIE _looks, sees the licence, starts, and turns round to hide
it_.
NELLIE.]
[_Agitated._] No, there’s nothing here at all.
[FREDDIE _comes in with the scissors_.
FREDDIE.
Here they are!
MRS. DOT.
Thanks so much.
[_She goes out._
NELLIE.
Freddie, how could you be so incautious? It was only by the greatest
presence of mind that I was able to hide it.
FREDDIE.
What _do_ you mean?
NELLIE.
You ought to have told me. I don’t think it was nice of you to get a
licence without saying a word to me about it. I think it was a great
liberty.
FREDDIE.
A licence?
NELLIE.
You must know that I can’t marry you. Nothing will induce me to break my
promise to Gerald. I’m very angry with you.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account